Joey’s bachelor party (Joey’s version)

We are skipping ahead here because Chandler got married before me. I’m sure it didn’t surprise anyone that I was the last to get married. They might have been surprised I got married at all. But Phoebe stole my heart, and I had to propose to keep her mine forever.

Then one night I didn’t pull out and I knocked her up. Six months before the wedding date. I was going to have a very pregnant bride. This was going to be my last hoo-rah before I was a father.

I made Ross my best man, but I did the planning for my party myself. I invited a pretty big group of guys. We were hitting the slopes in Colorado. Renting a condo right there by the lift. We were going to board during the day and get drunk at night.

And that’s what we did on Friday.

Saturday was a bit more interesting.

We were waiting in line for the lift up to the top on Saturday morning. I noticed there were some cute snow bunnies behind us. I let the boys go, and I hopped on the lift with these girls.

Ten minutes of uninterrupted flirting. They fell in love with me. I made sure that they remembered me. I even gave one of them my number. They were giggling as we all got off the lift, and slid down the incline.

I pushed over to where the guys were waiting. Ross asked, “Why’d you abandon us dude? It’s your bachelor party.”

I replied, “I never miss a chance to flirt with some tail.”

Ross laughed, “Well I hope you don’t do that when you’re married.”

We hit the slopes for the morning, then went to the lodge for some drinks and lunch. I didn’t recognize them as I walked past them, but the girls from the lift recognized me, and called me over to their table.

They were cute without their helmets and goggles on. I was lucky. You never know with people’s faces so hidden under their snow gear. A blonde with a thick braid yelled, “Oh hey Mr. Chairlift!”

I walked over, and confirmed it was their same snow gear they were wearing. I said, “Hey there! How have the slopes been for you girls?”

A long haired brunette smiled at me, “It’s been great. You should eat with us.”

I replied, “Sure. I’m going to hit the bar first. You girls want anything?”

A freckled faced blonde answered, “Sure. We’ll take some Bloody Marys.”

So I got them drinks, and ate with them. The guys might have been a little pissed that I left them. They actually left without me to return to skiing.

It was fun flirting with them. It had been a while since I’d done anything like this. I had been extremely loyal to Phoebe. But it was good to know that I still had it.

After the drinks, I left the girls and tried to find the group on the mountain. Eventually I did, and we finished out the day.

We cleaned up and then had a nice dinner. On the walk back to the condo I received a text from one of the girls: “Heyyy do you want to come hang out with us? Bring a couple friends if you have them.”

The group had I for the bachelor party was pretty big. I had to decide who I wanted to bring that would be cool. I decided on my oldest and most trustworthy friends.

I wrangled Chandler and Ross to the side and asked, “Hey can you guys do me a favor? Those girls I talked to earlier invited me over and wanted me to bring a couple friends. You’re the lucky guys.”

Ross replied, “Dude we’re married! We have no interest in hanging out with these girls. Choose a couple of the single guys.”

“No. They’re not cool like you two. We’ve been through a lot, and I know I can trust you.” I looked to Chandler, “This isn’t the first time we’ve done something shady on bachelor trip.”

Chandler nodded, “That’s true. Who are these girls anyway?”

I replied, “They’re seniors out here on Spring Break!”

“Fuck! I’m going to feel so old talking to them,” Ross said.

“Don’t worry,” I replied. “It won’t take long for me to get my dick wet, then we can come back to the condo and listen to the other guys snoring.”

“What do we tell the other guys?” Asked Chandler.

“We don’t tell them shit. We just leave and come back after we have some fun,” I said. “Are you guys ready?”