Go Downstairs

Ichigo left his bedroom, convinced that Rukia wasn't in the closet. He wasn't able to hear any noises coming from inside, so he decided that he'd better hurry up so Yuzu would quit screaming for him. He knew the neighbors would appreciate it if she were quieter. But before Ichigo could even make it to the stairs to go have his breakfast, out of nowhere came a blur and someone yelling, "GOOOOOD MOOORRNING IIIIICHIIGOOOOO!" and WHAM! Two feet connected with Ichigo's forehead, causing his face to plant on the floor for the second time that morning.
He was quick to get up as he screamed, "WHAT THE HELL DAD! DO YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO TRY AND KILL ME EVERY DAY? WHY DO YOU KEEP DOING THAT TO YOUR OWN SON!"
"Your reflexes were slow this morning son! You need to be on guard at all times! I'm just helping you develop plenty of skills to help you deal with ruffians and deviants."
"You mean like YOU?" Ichigo's father, Isshin growled at him, but he didn't get a chance to react before Ichigo leaped in the air, and while spinning, kicked him in the face. Isshin's face seemed to slide sideways a bit, and it never got a chance to recover its original shape before Ichigo regained his footing, then charged forward tackling his father and pitching him backward. Isshin had about a second and a half to pummel Ichigo's back with his fists, before the two tumbled backward down the stairs looking like two large fighting cats twisting and clawing at each other. They both landed at the foot of the stairs at Yuzu's feet.
"DAD!" Yuzu yelled, pointing a wooden spoon in her father's face. "STOP IT NOW! And YOU Ichigo," she swung the spoon at him, "You are going to be late if you don't stop play fighting with Dad!"
Both Isshin and Ichigo shouted, "PLAY FIGHTING?"
Karin said, "I don't know why the heck you two are always fighting."
"It's never MY idea!" Ichigo said as he got up off the floor.
"It's to toughen you up!" Isshin said.
Karin said, "Dad, you're acting like a hyperactive teenager with all this fighting crap. You're not doing Ichigo any favors by surprising him with a beating all the time!"
"HUH?" Isshin said as he looked like his feelings had been hurt.
"She's right Dad!" Yuzu agreed.
Isshin sniveled a bit, then looked across the kitchen to the huge blown up poster of his late wife. He ran to it, hugging the wall saying, "Masaki, I don't know what's gotten into these kids. I try and do my best for them and give them all I can, and this is how they treat me! SNIFF Oh how I wish you were here with me, because you'd understand." Isshin wept at the poster while Ichigo shoved a piece of toast in his mouth, picked up his lunch and prepared to leave.
All three of Isshin's kids stopped for a moment and looked at him and his antics. Ichigo said, "Weird," and went toward the door to leave.
Yuzu said, "Dad is SUCH a baby!"
Karin said, "He's an imbecile."
Isshin continued his rant, "Do you hear them Masaki? Do you? They have no respect for their father. They used to worship me, but that all changed when they hit puberty! Masaki, they're horrible!" Isshin blubbered, tears flying.
. . .
As soon as Ichigo was out of the house he rubbed at his sore head. "I'm gonna have to put a bell on my Dad so I know where he is. He's gotta quit surprising me all the time! He just about gave me a heart attack today!" He walked to school slowly, wondering still if Rukia was already there or not.
He continued to rub his head, not paying attention where he was going. His feet knew the way to school, so he just followed them, that is until he almost ran bodily into Rangiku, who was dressed in 'civilian' clothing. "Hey!" she said brightly to him, but all he saw through his bleary vision was breasts.
"Oh hey Rangiku. What are you doing here?"
"Guess who got a day pass to go shopping!" she bounced up and down with glee, she was so happy.
"My guess would be you?"
"YES!"
"Well, have a good time then. I've got to go to school, but my head is killing me."
"What happened to your head?" she asked.
"My FATHER happened to my head."
"Really? Wow, you've got one weird father."
"Tell me about it. Listen, I'd better get going. I'm kind of late as it is."
Rangiku had a brilliant idea. "Ichigo, how about you ditch school today and come shopping with me?"
"Oh, that's a nice offer Rangiku, but I've missed so much school already."
She walked forward toward him and bent over a little, enhancing the view of her breasts that Ichigo already had. "But it'll be FUN! Plus, I need someone to carry all my bags."
"Wow, those things are HUGE!" Ichigo thought as his eyes drank in the sight of Rangiku's massively impressive breasts. Then he shook his head, which reminded him that he had a headache and he said, "Oh, so you just want me to be your bag boy then?"
Rangiku crossed her arms under her breasts which seemed to lift them higher. She said flatly, "I'll pay you."
Ichigo thought, "Spending the day shopping with a large breasted woman, AND getting paid to carry her bags? Not a bad way to spend a day. But I don't know. With all the school I've missed, I really should go there instead." When Ichigo looked back at Rangiku, who was looking at him beseechingly, something absolutely male stirred in him while his sense of responsibility fought against it.