Giving your brother a much needed call

Jerry : Hello faggot face I need a favor from you cocksucker.

Brother : Hello there Jerry, you little muff muncher... Oh wait I'm not allowed to call you that. Because that would suggest that there is even one girl who would allow a piece of shit loser like you to approach her, let alone eat her pussy out. In fact, Jerry, you're such a loser that I can 100% accurately guess what dreadful clothes you're probably wearing even though I'm not even at home right now.

Jerry : Yeah right. As if you, a dumb-ass shithead, could ever be intelligent enough to ever guess correctly in your life of steroid and cock rotation? In any case, please tell me, big brother, what you think I'm wearing.

Brother : Given your lack of creativity and your desire to be a hipster, it's likely that you're dressed in a tacky shirt that mocks yourself and some ridiculously geeky shoes and pants.

Jerry : Alright good guess. You got lucky.

Brother : Told you I knew. Anyways all jokes and banter aside, how is life at home?

Jerry : Not so great I'm broke and the computer's dead. Plus there's the fact that the parents are still biggots so there's that. However on the bright side I was accepted into the Girl Scouts.

Anyhow, how is college going?

Brother : Glad to know somethings never change. Wait, wait, did I hear properly. You mentioned that the Girl Scouts had accepted you. What? As a boy, you are not permitted to join the Girl Scouts, so don't claim that your attractiveness brought you there. As you have the leftover DNA, we both know when it comes to look you don't have any. Did I mention that I've known you long enough to know what an unethical little shit you are? Also, don't say that your good deads got you there. We both know you've never done anything in your life.

Jerry : Left over DNA jeaze your a prick, I thought you said all jokes aside meaning we were putting the over the top insults on pause, but seeing as were back on insults I must say you seem like a dick with leftover DNA.

Brother : Indeed I did. That wasn't banter that was just an outright insult, nothing more or less.

Jerry : Anyways, I used your phone to get there

Brother : YOU WHAT!!!!

Jerry: Don't worry, it won't lead back to you because I created a new profile.

Brother: Alright, that makes sense, but have you told the parents yet?

Jerry : No I haven't. To be honest, I was hoping you could cover for me because I don't want to tell them.

Brother: You know I'm in college, don't you? How can I fill in for you? I am unable to assist in covering you.

Jerry : Actually there is.