Forging New Paths

Written in collaboration with Cross C

INTERVIEW WITH NEW WESTVIEW CITIZENS

The video changed briefly to show various images of the citizens of Westview all settling into their new homes. A man sat on a bench, visibly shaken by the ghost floating next to him. A woman inspects her fridge, showing it mostly barren, before closing it and reopening it to see it overflowing with food. Some nubile teenagers jump off the craggy cliffs together, reappearing at the top after a few seconds while laughing before rushing forwards to do it again.

“How are you settling into New Westview?” asked Darcy, before the screen started cutting from person to person standing in their doorway, each sharing their own answer.

The first woman was beaming, “Oh, it’s so nice! I always wanted to live by the sea, and now I have a lovely view of a magical eternal ocean right from my window!”

“I no longer need to pay rent, so fucking loving it.” said the next man. “Necessities too. Free magic hot water, magic electricity, and magic gas. Though don’t inhale the actual magic gas, I think that can fuck you up.”

“As a goth, I was already sooo ecstatic when it turned out witches were reeeal,” said the next woman, dressed in all black with face paint on, unable to raise her vocal register above dull droning, “but nooow? Waking up every daaay to purple skies and creeeepy whispers? I’m in gootthh heeeavveeennnn.”

“Nah, ghosts being real don’t really bother us none, Lassy. ‘Dey don’t get on our nerves if we don’t go disturbing ‘dem. And between Sarah, Agatha, and Wanda, we got plenty o’ protection if any start giving us lip!”

A middle aged woman wearing only a negligee and too much make-up winked her fake lashes at the camera, “Figuring out where the new residents would live was a little interesting. So many burly agents wanting to move into our town to be closer to Mark… I obviously opened my doors to as many big burly boys that wanted to live with lil ol me~”

“So the leaders explained there is one way to leave the pocket dimension, if we ‘so desire’… yeah, no one’s left, lol.” A younger man in a hoodie pushed up his glasses while sneering, speaking in a condescending nasally voice, “Those sexy S.H.I.E.L.D. science nerds took control of one of the smoking hot latina queen’s air portal things using a bunch of weird tech I’ve never seen. Now they have a guarded portal space that they can open and close to teleport out of The Abbey. You only get to leave after you’ve met the supreme leader.” He never lost his grin as he looked outwards, “Yeah, I think I’m gonna do well in this cult. I bet Mark’s totally gonna let me have sex with you, big boobs.”

A tongue was clicked behind the camera before the cut away, “Ew. Get lost and shower, loser. I’d fuck a duck before I’d touch you.”

He got angry at that, “You what-?!”

It instead showed an older woman with a white bob cut and big smile, “Oh, hello there! I’m a gardener by trade, and I found there’s a lovely garden to be tended to! Some of the plants are a little strange… and I think some of them whispered at me… but I just love the opportunity to help out my community like this! Thank you Mark!” she said with a wave to camera.

“We can still… sort of… feel Mark through the air,” admitted one seemingly nature themed ginger woman wistfully, “I believe it at least. Wanda is connected to this magical pocket world, she’s connected to Mark, and we to her. It means our hearts beat in one with his magnificent dreams.”

“It also means we get horny when he gets horny,” said the next guy, “And bro, can Mark be goddamn horny. The amount of times my sister has burst into my room to ride my dick is giving me chafing down there something crazy!”

“I joined S.H.I.E.L.D. to make a difference in the world, now I’ve sucked off so many civilians I can barely remember my basic training.” said a short dark haired woman with a wide smile, “Wouldn’t change a thing.”

The last man tilted his head towards Darcy, “Mark is still doing greetings, yeah? Wants to meet the whole town or something?”

“That’s what I hear,” said Darcy, “I think they’re working through it in batches-”

Suddenly the interview was interrupted by Phil Coulson yelling behind the camera, “BEEKER’S STREET! YOU HAVE BEEN SUMMONED TO THE ABBEY! DO NOT DALLY FOR MARK’S SAKE!”

“Shit, I’m up. Wish me luck!” the man being interviewed suddenly got all flustered and grabbed his keys, “Wait, don’t need these. Fuck, do I need to be naked or something? Oh man, I hope I get one of those ‘mutant power’ changes!”

So the Forge based reality warping event continued on. Transforming his new kingdom one by one using the magics available to him from his new reality warping woman. Wanda was oh so happy to do what she was told by the man she loved. Believing in the happiness that each of his subjects felt upon the change.

He changed women.

“Oh fuck, I always wanted my own cheerleader squad!” Mark praised the latest batch of university girls to line up for him, “Nat, this has been a dream of mine, do I really need to wait till after for an orgy?!”

“You promised, Mark.”

“Ugghh… fine. But I get my cheerleader orgy soon, got it?!”

He changed men.

“So what Shuri did is replace all the dude’s nut juice with lube. So even if they did get the occasional fuck, all they’d be doing would be lubing the girl’s holes up for him to impregnate. Isn’t that crazy hot?”

Wanda hummed, “Anything science can do can be done much easier with the right spell, Mark~”

He would alter group after group that walked into that magical forge.

“Man, I got really lucky to have an entire spy platoon inside the Hex when I grabbed Wanda,” Mark grinned, admiring all his sexy S.W.O.R.D. and S.H.I.E.L.D. agents one by one. “I don’t know how I want to mould them first! Should I give them all new uniforms? Make a new dumb acronym for them to follow like Agents of M.A.R.K. or Agents of P.H.O.E.N.I.X.?”

“What would they stand for?” asked Natasha, “The… Morally Ambiguous Reality Keepers? The Post Human Order Entwined Nightly In X-Men?”

America quickly joined in, “Or the Penis Hot Oral… uh, ENIX.” She and Felicia laughed together at her giving up.

“I’m sure we can figure out something better at some point,” said Wanda, running a hand along the spy woman in front of them, “But with magic I’m sure I can do something about their outfits. What kind of uniforms would you want?”

“Not sure, something sexy…” said Mark, scratching his chin in thought as his eyes drifted over to his Chun-Li. Standing proudly at attention, awaiting his command. “Maybe we should stick with the Street Fighter theme? Bison gave his mind controlled evil chicks these sexy one pieces that have always stayed with me.”

“The dolls. Most famously the origin of Cammy White, but also had members such as Juli, Juli, and Decapre.” Everyone gave a pretty astounded look to the super spy spouting nerd knowledge, “Back in Markanda, Street Fighter was played by everyone. Mark loved a good gaming tournament and the psychics made it so everyone was enamoured by the series. I got pretty good, even if everyone typed ‘kys’ when I won or lost.” Felicia was quick to rub up sympathetically to Nat, who pet the white haired woman back.

“Ah! Here we go, this outfit?” asked America, showing off the image on her phone. “Crazy this Caretaker lady here had WiFi in the Abbey, huh?”

“That’s it, yup, that’s the style,” said Mark, snapping his fingers towards the woman saluting. “Think you can recreate that, Wanda?”

His magic thrall just smirked, “Mark, I once held back an alien titan. A little bit of cosplay for the love of my life is easy~”

To show off at bit, Wanda started cocooning the next four spies in line. Red magic enveloping and wrapping around the three girls and one boy before their new forms were revealed.

It was hard to argue with the sexy results.

From the ground up, they were no longer bare foot on the stone floor anymore. Light brown combat boots, each pair pressed together as they stood to attention, with absolutely nothing else on below the belt. Bare legs rose from the boots like mighty trunks–Wanda having thickened the spies up to be hot plump sluts and one thick muscular man–all the way up to the crotches. It was hard not to see the four camel toes on display around where the long sleeve one piece began, yes four. The three girls had such plump pussy lips easily seen through the dark blue fabric that you could see them dampening in real time the longer Mark looked. The man however had clearly been cock caged. His paltry testicles creating a camel toe just below where his little iron clad lump was.

The one piece itself was navy blue with lines running up it, looking somewhere between uniform and comfy cardigan. A stretchy material that was practically painted on their skin. The new double d’s the girls were all sporting had the ‘armour’ wrapping around their tits to show each bounce of their ragged breathing. A single yellow tie trapped between their bosoms as if begging Mark to replace it with his dick. The one piece continued upwards into a turtleneck, shoulder pads, and red armoured gauntlets. Finalising the design was a navy blue beret that all four were inadvertently pointing to in their military salute to Mark.

“Ohh, amazing job, Wanda! It’s like they walked right out of Shadaloo!” Mark praised, clapping his approval at the delightful and demeaning designs. “Give us a spin.”

The blonde of the three quickly did as told, only breaking her expression to gasp as Mark spanked her new thick rear. “Yeah! Always wanted to do that. Mm. Maybe we can use your powers to make a few more girls from that game?”

Wanda looked so happy that he was happy, “Anything for you, my love.”

“Nice! Let’s make the next girl into R. Mika!”

Just as the tendrils of Wanda’s magic began wrapping around the woman’s legs, she suddenly put her hands up to defend herself. “WAIT!”

Wanda did halt, but all were confused at this rejection of Mark’s desired will.

“Why do you resist?”

“I… because this is not my true form. I have yet to become truly naked for you, master.”

Mark tilted his head, totally lost until she started turning a different shade. Everyone jumped back a little as the woman went from a 5/10 blonde woman to a freaky man’s green skinned dream.

Familiar chin ridges.. Sharp pointed ears…

When he realised what he was looking at, Mark’s reaction was immediate, visceral, and completely broke his "Cool God-King" persona.

“Skrull!” he scrambled back and pointed an accusing finger at her, “Don’t let her touch you! Shape-shifter! She’s a sleeper agent!”

Every history class, every panicked late-night news special back home had drilled one thing into his head since middle school: Skrulls weren’t just aliens, they were shape-shifting religious zealots who wanted to steal Earth and make it their own. The ultimate boogeyman that had given him nightmares as a kid, the same green-skinned zealots who had swapped out half the Avengers and chanted "He loves you" while trying to enslave the human race. He didn't care that he was practically a god in this place; his brain instantly reverted to the terrified kid watching Norman Osborn blow the Skrull Queen’s head off on live TV, knowing that if you see one, an invasion **** is already five steps ahead of you.

His head whipped around, “Who else is a Skrull?!”

To his growing horror, a naked man in a mask with feathers awkwardly raised his hand as he turned abruptly green and Mark jerked his way sending his dangling dick swinging, “Uh me too. Hi. I’m Gary.”

Both Skrulls were abruptly yanked up into the air with shimmering ruby auras around their naked alien forms. Wanda was between him and them, hands out, “Mark, look at me. I have them. They can't touch you.” To the Skrulls she harshly demanded, “What do you want? What are you doing here?”

The female looked terrified, “I… I work for Nick Fury’s S.A.B.E.R. I was placed on Phil’s team to keep an eye on him.”

The male looked relaxed oddly enough as he floated in the air wreathed by ruby light, “Spying on Hayward.”

“Mark.” Natasha was at his side, voice low and steady, hand resting on the small of his back before sliding down to grasp his butt, “We’re not in our reality. Breathe. Even back home not every Skrull was an invader. This one says she works for Fury. That matters.”

Phil Coulson cleared his throat and stepped forward, “She’s telling the truth. In our universe there is a Skrull empire out there somewhere, and yes, some factions have done ugly things. But the Skrulls we’ve dealt with on Earth started as refugees. They’ve been here about thirty years, hiding, surviving, and in Fury’s orbit the whole time.”

'Great' he thought, jaw tight. 'Big scary Phoenix King and I still flinch like a kid who just saw a monster under his bed.' He felt especially dumb because who cared if there were Skrulls? Not only were these two his already, he had superheroines and an army of S.H.I.E.L.D. agents at his beck and call.

“I did not mean to offend when I rejected your change, Master Mark.” said the girl, bowing low, “My name is Eral. My people can become who we need to be, and I believe I can be more useful to you like this instead.”

Natasha hummed next to Mark, “She has a point. Shape changers can make for excellent spies. Especially if she’s already infiltrated Coulson’s team without being found out.”

“Yeah, that Mystique gal in Markanda sure seemed useful… when she wasn’t teasing me by changing into the girls I lost…” said Mark, scratching his chin while analysing the green skinned gal, “Can you turn into anyone super attractive?”

Eral considered the question for a moment, searching for the correct answer. After a beat, her skin changed hue, her shoulders broadened, and a massive penis grew from her crotch.

“Master Mark. You are truly the most attractive being on any planet-”

“Cute,” Mark chuckled at his mirror image, “I meant super hot for me. I’ve had enough of staring at my own face recently,” he shot a slightly pissed off glance at Agatha who smiled knowingly at him. “But you really do change all the way to the nards, huh? I always wanted to fuck a shape changer and feel cunts shift as I fuck her…”

With another nod, the Skrull’s ‘Mark’ face morphed and twisted into a much more feminine form. Eral’s knowledge of human history had been fairly in depth, so she hoped that changing into a historical figure of beauty would entice Mark to fuck her. The colour drained from her face, as a black and white greyscale picture of Marilyn Munroe winked seductively at Mark, raising her dress to show off her lovely pure panties underneath.

“...yeah, fuck it. You’ve convinced me. Someone get me a chair, I’m gonna let this girl ride me!” He said with a snap of his fingers. The whole room seemed electric with excitement, rushing to serve him, though none more so than ‘Marilyn’ who beamed like she’d just won an Oscar. Mark sat down in the freshly produced chair, “Just remember, every time I hit all the way inside of you I want you to change into a new girl. Full fucking cervix slamming montage, baby!”

“Yes sir!” Eral quickly agreed, removing the fake panties that sat on her hips by morphing them away.

Nat sighed, not wanting to be the mood dampener every time but still wanting to be responsible, “Mark…”

“I’ve been pent up for hours now, Nat!” He snapped back, “I get one quickie! Besides, this is like… Skrull therapy, or something.”

America was quick to defend her man, “Yeah, come on, Nat! Mark’s earned a break!” She wrapped her arm around Nat’s shoulders, moving her back until she sat back down on her own chair, “You have too, girl. I know your body still needs rest after Mark’s resurrection. Can’t you let our Pussycat lick your pussy while Mark has some fun?”

“...alright, fine. One quickie,” Nat relented, especially as Felicia’s arms began wrapping around her too. “Can we just… make sure we don’t totally devolve into hedonism for once…?”

“Don’t worry, Natasha. I shall make sure Mark gets right back on track after his quickie,” smiled Wanda. Nat felt a wash of relief (unrelated to the cat beginning to lap at her snatch) as she realised she had another sensible head in the team of lust seekers.

“Hey! We haven’t fucked yet! Wanna quickie too, Escarlata MILF?”

Wanda was taken aback by America’s barbaric seduction attempt, but smirked at her all the same. “Sure, if you think you can handle me.”

“Handle you? No offense, lady, but I can probably bench press this whole Abbey. I can easily-ALTO!”

America hadn’t expected red magic to wrap around her body unexpectedly and raise her to the sky. Locking her arms behind her back and spreading her legs right in front of Wanda’s smirking face, “I’ll be taking my taste test now.” She said before shifting the thin booty shorts away from America’s crotch and licking her cunt.

Mark had been watching the whole event with a proud smile, “Love it when my girls get along… oh shit, right, I have Marilyn waiting, lol. Come on, get to riding!”

The poor Skrull had been standing there leaking while staring at his crotch for only about a minute but she looked positively ready to burst from lust. Eral leapt at the chance, grabbing at her master’s crotch to line it up with President John F. Kennedy’s favourite pussy.

The benefits of being a shape changer are plentiful, but few ever realise that it gives you a very good idea of how best to control all your bodily functions. Lungs can be expanded for longer breathing, muscles grown for strength, and wombs can be swapped with those enflamed easier to make your pussy easily moist and hot for your lover. Eral made sure her insides were the perfect temperature for Mark, and in doing so he stretched out her tight pussy so easily it was like a glove. All the way to the back, where her body was ordered to have a ‘change form’ button.

Marilyn was morphed away, changing from black and white to mostly tan. A longer nose, blue eye shadow, and wearing only an ornamental Egyptian head dress. Though she forgo clothes–letting her natural breasts heave as she panted, with desire oozing out of her every pore–it was obvious to everyone who knew a modicum of history who this was.

“Who the fuck is this?”

“Cleopatra, dear,” called out Agatha from the back, seeing as all the other girls were busy moaning, “The Egyptian queen? Or were you too busy fucking the history teacher to pay attention?”

“Right, yeah… can we keep the shape changes to this damn century?! Show me some fucking modern actresses! Or supers I haven’t fucked yet, damn.”

Eral felt as guilty as she did pleasured. Shuddering around in her Cleopatra form as Mark’s cock spread her so much wider than she ever thought possible from a human. She still was eager to please, moving herself slowly up his shaft, “S-sorry… your wish is my command.”

Cleopatra went up… and a Kardashian came down.

Even in a world of sexy supers to jerk it to, Mark had still given the ass that broke the internet the time of day. Kim’s sexy body glistened atop his perfectly in the Forge’s fire light, and Eral felt proud as Mark ran his hands up her body to grope at her heaving breasts.

“Marrrkkk…” she groaned in that sexy accent, “No man has made me feel like you have inside…”

“Ooh yeah, that’s the stuff,” he grinned, bringing the sexy woman down to lewdly suck his tongue. “Mm, and the inside change is so cool. It’s like I’m stretching out a new cunt every time. Your pussy is gripping me so fucking tightly. Mm. Keep going!”

“Y-yhes shir…”

Eral had her hands on his shoulders, legs on the floor, and eyes rolled back in her Skrull skull. It was hard to fully invest all her mental faculties into serving when her body felt so ecstatic, but she was doing her best. Each hump of her hips against Mark’s massive tool made her so happy, changing her body to a new woman that he could enjoy, and making the long journey as an interplanetary refugee so damn worth it.

Mark didn’t fully recognise all the women that Eral was showing him, but he was appreciating the sexy montage of supple souls both visually and physically.

It started slow. There were more recognisable faces–getting to see Emma Watson and Megan Fox grinding on top of him with drool down their plush lips–though others he wasn’t as sure about. Those that Eral knew from living in this world that Mark hadn’t become as intimately familiar with. Maria Hill groaned like a slut, Pepper Potts’ insides felt tight for an older woman, and G’iah the Skrull had her eyes bulge in pleasure. Each were experiencing their own stretched cunt, as Eral reset her pussy with each transformation. She only had their DNA, not experiences, so each thrust was a new virginity lost.

She began to bounce quicker as the pleasure began to overtake her. Shuri was a familiar sight for a brief moment, as was Okoye, two girls he hadn’t got to fuck in Markanda, yet were now less busty but still bouncy. There were women that had been in the Avengers: feeling Valkyrie’s strength, Wanda’s younger form, and a slightly different looking Natasha all squeeze his cock. A green woman with strange markings and red hair, a blue woman with robotic limbs, and a strange bug-like woman all flashed before his eyes that he didn’t have a chance to ask about. They looked alien, and sexy. But Eral’s humping was beginning to increase to a fevered pitch.

Mark was thrusting back into her now. She raised her hands above her head, her rippling skin hard to hold onto as she continued to swap every second to a new form in her arsenal. Anyone she could think of, even if they were in the room: Darcy, Trish Talks, Margot Robbie, Wasp, Quake, Rhianna, Queen Ramonda, America, Billy Eilish, Felicia, Jessica Alba, Ayesha, Dakota Johnson, Agatha, Beyoncé. Literally anyone she could think of from her time on Earth and analysing the files of culture and heroes. Sometimes slipping into other Skrulls she knew without thinking about it.

Though by this point, Mark was pretty over his fear. He knew he’d have taken care of the Skrull queen much better than that asshole Norman Osborn ever could. The whole Skrull empire would have become his minions with just a few thrusts into that under-fucked alien cunt. Just like this girl was proving with her tight snatch bouncing on his cock.

With one final thrust, Mark slammed his hips down deep into the alien girl. Shooting his huge blast of cum straight up into her ever changing womb.

Eral screamed out in a voice that wasn’t her own, but still emitted all the feelings of love and lust from her Skrull heart for him. Mark would later learn that the woman was another figure from history, but one he was pretty happy to nut inside of, as he may never get the chance to cuck Captain America like this. Peggy Carter was a hot fuck to bust a load into, with huge heaving tits that quaked with her huge climax. Eral had only seen a few photos of the historical brunette, but got enough of a look at her beauty to fully show off the pure and sexy body of the agent for Mark. Red lipstick covered lips quivering out a well fucked coo as more jizz flowed into her body.

Ever the romantic, Mark rose up from the chair to lay her body on the Forge’s stone floor. Splattering the last few streams of his cum across Peggy’s nude form.

Eral continued to **** out eternal praise for her master as she struggled to stay awake. Flickering back through a few forms on the floor as her eyes fluttered. Mark got to see his cum covering Maria Hill, Wasp, Kim Kardashian, Felicia, Mantis… all before ending with Eral passed out in a form Mark hadn’t seen yet.

“Carol?!”

Indeed, the form of the super strong blonde Captain Marvel was the form that Eral fell asleep to. Mark’s sperm dripping from her fair features, smearing over the blonde’s muscular feminine form in a way only ruined posters of her had seen before.

It would be quite a shock to see Carol Danvers like this if you knew her.

Mark tilted his head down the line of women, towards the person that had called out. Raising an eyebrow towards the dark skinned woman who stood to attention like the rest of the men and women around her, though with the added massive white cock that was beginning to rise between her legs.

“Futa Puta! You made it!” cheered America, flying down from Wanda licking her pussy while grinning before landing a full body hug on Monica, “I was worried you’d run off after all the fun! How do you feel now that you’re a real person, part of the Phoenix Kingdom?”

“Yeah… I feel great, America.” Monica dryly smiled at the overexcited Latina.

INTERVIEW WITH MONICA

“So, where were you after the battle with Agatha?”

Monica looked uncomfortable for a few reasons. Not liking the question, or the chair, or the way her pants felt way too tight around her thick junk.

“I was just trying to make sure everyone was okay,” she admitted, still pulling at her clothed crotch as she talked, “A lot of people started walking towards the center of town after the fight, but somebody had to keep an eye on the perimeter. Military. Feds. Anybody stupid enough to come poking around while we were all… distracted.”

“You completely skipped the celebration orgy,” Darcy said, accusingly. “Do you know how rude that is? Agatha goes down, you were right there one of the main heroines who made it happen, the town survives, everybody’s getting wet and wild, and you just vanish?”

Monica’s expression tightened for a second before she smoothed it out. “I was being responsible.”

Darcy made a noise like Monica had personally insulted science.

“Responsible?” she echoed. “Monica, your cock should have been there. You should have been there. I… very much was there. We could have revisited certain highly educational developments. You absolutely rocked my world, back in the before times. Since apparently nobody here is going to say it on camera, I will. That dick is insane. You fuck like a freight train and eat pussy like you’re getting paid per scream.”

A laugh snorted from somewhere off-screen.

Darcy, now fully committed, kept going. “No, seriously. I was there. I have peer-reviewed data. All our minds were going crazy from the magic hormones that Wanda’s Hex was leaking and Monica was right there on the front lines saving us from our own oozing cunts. She pounds like she’s trying to breach a bunker and then turns around and buries her face between your thighs like the cure for sadness is in there somewhere. This town should be issuing public service announcements.”

“Darcy,” Monica said, warning heavy in her voice.

“And for the record,” Darcy went on, “I did not even get any king cock at that orgy. So from my perspective, the whole event was already underperforming until Mark grabbed my tit. Then you didn’t show up either? That is a catastrophic failure of scheduling. I could have had round two with the woman carrying the second best dick in Westview and instead I got nothing. Nothing.”

Monica exhaled slowly through her nose. “I was making sure no one interrupted.”

Darcy blinked. “That is so much less sexy than what I wanted your answer to be.”

“It’s the answer. And what kinda whack-ass ‘sexy’ answer did you expect?”

“Obviously what I wanted was something like, ‘Darcy, I was waiting to get you alone again because you take orders better with your mouth full.’” She tilted her head. “Which, by the way, still stands. Wouldn’t you prefer to shut me up with your dick in my mouth right now?”

Monica closed her eyes for one brief second.

The camera caught the exact moment she remembered that this interview was supposed to make her look like one more happy little citizen in love with the new order, not a woman being heckled by a horny astrophysicist about private extracurriculars.

When she opened them again, her smile was small, careful, and just awkward enough to sell.

“I...” Monica started, then cleared her throat. “I think Mark deserves everyone’s full attention right now.”

Darcy made a strangled sound. “Wow. Okay. That was very loyal and very hot and also deeply unsatisfying.”

Monica shifted in the chair again, still trying not to think about how tight her pants felt. “He does.”

That answer came out a little too quickly. A little too earnestly.

Darcy noticed. Of course she noticed.

“Oh my God,” she said, delighted. “You’re doing the awkward love thing.”

Monica frowned. “I am not doing a thing.”

“You totally are. You’ve got the voice. The weird little pause. The ‘yes, our glorious king’ energy.”

Monica’s face tightened in a way that might have been embarrassment and might have been annoyance. “Mark saved this town.”

“And he’s hot,” Darcy pressed.

Monica hesitated.

“He’s certainly...” She searched for the safest possible word and still somehow managed to sound awkward. “Compelling.”

Darcy clutched at her own chest like she’d just been shot.

“Compelling,” she repeated. “Holy shit. Monica, you are gone.”

“Sitting right here, Darcy.”

“Yeah you are! Up top!” She emerged from behind the camera to make Monica give her a high-five, something she gave up even while being baffled to the reasoning.

“Why is my interview so much longer than everyone else's?"

“It’s called journalism. Something you’re not familiar with as you sit there all noble and responsible, while not answering the important question.”

Monica narrowed her eyes. “Which is?”

“Why,” Darcy said, leaning back into frame, “did you leave me unattended, unsupervised, and tragically under-fucked while the whole town was apparently having the world’s most cursed victory party?”

That finally got a ****, tiny smile out of Monica.

“Because,” Monica said, smoothing her face back into something more official, “unlike some people, I was thinking with the head on my shoulders.”

Darcy stared at her for one beat.

Then she tipped her glasses down her nose and looked over them with exaggerated disbelief.

“Monica,” she said, very dryly, “that is not the head I associate with your best work.”

This time the laugh off camera was louder.