Fiiiine, I'll go in

“That is a bit reassuring, but I am still the first human, mice are not humans, so while it is a bit comforting, I’m not so sure about going ahead".

“It's your choice, Chloe", he shrugs, and inside, I sigh, just..everything I've felt seeing him, and now, the hesitation and uncertainty about this decision. It's a big change, after all, and hopefully, I'll get a uterus and a good chest, but I doubt it. It's not magic, after all, how can it give me a womb? And how can it give me a che..

"Chloe, you’re my best friend, words cannot express the anger and sadness I felt knowing how your parents mistreated you, how they abused you, how you could not afford to live a happy life and how you are still struggling, if anything were to happen to you because of the machine, I will destroy it, I absolutely do NOT want anything bad happening to you, I would rather destroy my work that I created by working all day for 1 and a half years than see you be harmed."

Those words, so sweet, so mellifluous, so dreamy, so sudden, they break me out of my spiralling stupor of sadness.

But they're not really enough, he worked so hard on this machine and gave it his all, even cutting off contact with everyone he loves and cares about. Sure, it was probably hard on all of us, but it was probably hard for him too.

My eyebrows scrunch up, "No, I don’t want you to destroy the machine, can I just have a few minutes to think?"

"Sure!"

After some seconds, I decide.

“Can you please just hold me? I haven’t seen you in so long, and I missed you, I don’t care if you haven’t bathed in over a year, if I were to come out of the machine a disfigured mess, one of the last things I wish to remember is your warmth, how you felt.”

And with that, I embrace him, his musky smell assaulting my nose. It's a bit bad, but it's also a bit calming, I know that this really IS his smell, that it really IS him, my best friend, with whom I've had so many good memories, with whom I've been through so much.

He starts patting me, and running his hands through my hair, causing my muscles to loosen a bit more, it's so comforting..

C'mon, Chloe, you can't continue just hugging him, you need to decide!

You know what, girl? Fuck it, I'm going in.

Detangling ourselves, I look him in the eye, feeling like I have an air of confidence around me.

"OK, I’m ready”, I feel as if I've breathed in some of that air, and exhaled it through my mouth.

“Before you go in, I have to tell you that silver and rubber melts in the machine, and any makeup or hair dye becomes permanent, the makeup you’re currently wearing will become your natural look, and if you’re wearing any hair dye, then the dye will become your natural colour.”

My makeup will become my natural look? I wonder how my skin will be affected by it..

Oh well, I'm willing to take the chance of possible skin damage if it means that I'll naturally look this beautiful.

“I’m alright with that, here, can you please hold this?”, I hand him my silver necklace, and go into the bathroom, because I both need some alone time to get some stress off & to remove..some things.

--

After breathing my last breath of pain, I gather myself, picking up all the courage I can find, and decide to head straight into the machine.

As I step in fully, the door closes.

My heartbeat is more audible now, as I worry what will happen, I already removed all of my silver accessories, so they will still be with me when I come out of this machine, possibly a disfigured mess.

Interestingly enough, this pink (or at least, pink-looking, considering the air around me) coffin doesn't feel cramped, it's relatively comfy, and the substance in the air doesn't feel too hot as well, nor does it really hurt or trigger any sensations.

I just hope that it will give me a good, voluptuous chest, as the women in my family are not that well-endowed, and I want to be. I hope to whatever gods exist that it does; oestrogen can give me boobs, but it wouldn't give me boobs bigger than my genes, I hope that it doesn't follow oestrogen in this way and gives me the chest that I actually want.

I also want a uterus & have always yearned to menstruate, I want to be a mother, I want to be like cis women, hopefully it can give me those as well.

After a few more minutes of slight humidity, I hear the door open, and walk out of the capsule, being able to feel the changes.

My blouse feels a lot more tight now, and I can feel the air on my stomach, and my smell..

Everything is just..a lot more intense now, before I could notice his odour but now..now it's on a whole new level of intensity.

I wonder how my taste has changed..I know that taste is a possible change on oestrogen, maybe I can see after I make food for him..

Speaking of him, my legs carry me towards him, and I can't help but hug him.

It feels nice knowing that I finally have my ideal, female, body, and although his odour kinda repels me, knowing that he's always stuck up for me, how he's always supported me, and how now he made such a big sacrifice to give me my ideal body, and it worked! It actually fucking worked..it's all just..

it's all just so much at once, but his smell..

his smell stirs me in a certain way that it wouldn't have before, it smells different too.

I like hugging him, but I feel like doing..something else.

I follow my instinct, look up at him, and bring my head closer to his.

“Chloe, I haven’t bathed in over a year, are you sure you want to kiss me?”, he tries to put some distance between us, but it fails, I feel his hand between my boobs, and then see his gaze move lower and lower, until it reaches them, as he stares with a look of awe.