Enter the shop

A jangle of chimes and bells play from the door as it swings closed. The storefront's ceiling lights are all off, leaving the place shadowy, illuminated mostly by sunlight coming in through the window, and to a lesser degree by thick red candles. The store is bigger than you expected. You can make out books on mythology and mysticism, and a good number of esoteric artifacts—a tree branch wrapped in yellow ribbon, a set of antlers, a smoky mirror, and a blanket covered with runes—sitting on shelves or hanging on walls.

Around the center of the room, a woman is sitting cross-legged on a thick paisley rug, her eyes shut in contemplation. She's a vampire bat, lavender-furred with a large flat nose, one perky, sizable ear inclined slightly as she hears you enter. "A snake!" she says softly, a bit reverently, as she opens her eyes. "I could feel the incoming energy of some being of the earth and soil. I am honored by your presence here today."

"Honored?" you say, with a slow blink.

The bat rises and bows to you. She's short, at least a head shorter than you, but generously proportioned. Very generously. Yoga pants outline her wide hips and thick thighs, and a tight white crop top reveals a pudgy purple belly with a small, cute navel. The bat fingers an ankh necklace lying in the deep valley of her great round breasts. "Welcome to my humble establishment, where I, Chrysanthemum, master of the arcane, will serve as your guide to the spirit world." She smiles, revealing short little fangs. "But you can call me 'Chryssie'."

"Nice to meet you, Chryssie." you say, flattered by her attention despite yourself. "I'm Tony." It's warm in here; you unzip your sweatshirt. "I've never talked to a psychic before. How does this work?"

"That's quite all right. It's a highly individual process." Chryssie approaches you and gently takes your paws in hers. The mammalian warmth beneath her fine smooth fur is comforting, and you feel as if you've released a breath you've been holding for a long time. "Just tell me what's been troubling you, or what you'd like to know. Whatever's on your mind." Her voice is pleasantly musical. Her intonation is exaggerated, even performative, but as derogatory as it may sound to call something "performative", you enjoy the feeling that she's putting on a little show for an audience of one: you. "I'll suggest a spiritual practice that may bring you illumination, and together we'll find your new path."