Be the Wingman

Honestly this isn't the most devastation you could wreak on the titans. If you wanted to you could have used this to permanently fracture the relationship between Raven and Starfire. Perhaps even set it into a wider cascade effect that would inevitably tear apart the core team. But really, why stop there when you could gain so much more. You can gain their trust.

You recall your father's lessons on it well; "Trust is the single rarest currency which all modern monetary systems fail to imitate. It cannot be bartered, traded, or loaned. It cannot accrue interest, nor be hoarded indefinitely. The only means to acquire it is through effort, but it can be lost in a thousand ways before it is ever spent. If you have trust invested in you, you have power over the one that gave it. This power is subtle at first, but it may be used to acquire more. And as with all forms of power comes the privilege of choice."

And what a choice it is. Why stop with dismantling one branch of the titans when you could leverage it into the destruction of the greater organization? Your pride demands nothing less with the opportunity before you.

"Ok" you begin. "I know exactly what we need to do." Raven looks doubtful.

"But first, I need to ask Starfire a question. And I don't think you can be there when I ask her."

"Why-"

"Please Raven. Trust me. I'm good at these kinds of things." You think. Honestly your limited life experience has left you woefully unprepared for a relationship of this scale and complexity. But if your father's "socialization simulators" are even halfway correct then their entire issue can be resolved with one carefully guided conversation.

Raven grumbles for a moment about it being unfair but eventually defers to your "expertise" as you lay out exactly what she needs to say and do. Unfortunately you're not able to get her to go straight to the roof like you hoped. As she shepherds you back to the party you see a very naked Starfire stepping out with a rather dazed looking Redstar, Aqualad and...Bumblee? Huh, well good for her. Unfortunately for them it's time for you to play wingman and that means cock blocking the competition. Is it still cock blocking if one of them's a girl? Never mind.

"And you're sure I can't stay and hear you talk to her?"

"Yes. But I could use your help dispersing her entourage."

Raven grumbles again as you both approach to meet the oncoming group. You stand in the hallway forming a unified front as Starfire turns away from her paramours.

"Friend Raven!" She begins jubilantly floating over and hugging the dower sorceress. "Have you chosen a new mate as well?"

"N-no. He's-"

"Dan, the pizza guy" you interrupt stepping between them. You extend a hand "pleasure to meet you."

Starfire giggles and grabs the top of your hand and literally shakes it. "I'm also a relationship counselor" as of ten minutes ago. You easily step to the side and place your hand around her lower back. As you do Starfire seems to go a little limp.

"If you don't mind, I'd like to talk with you for just a moment" you softly begin rubbing her lower back and she seems to relax offering up only token resistance.

"W-what about my mates?" You briefly glance back in time for Raven to start pulling her angry-tentacle monster routine, much to the terror of the **** trio before continuing.

"They'll be around. Later. So Starfire you've been on earth for quite some time now haven't you?"

"Mhm yes. It has been a most wondrous experience."

"You must be very knowledgeable about earth culture wouldn't you say?" You glance back, rounding a corner as you continue to lead Starfire away from the group and the party. You need to get the piece of information while she's in as relaxed a state as possible before regrouping with Raven on the roof.

"Oh yes...I am much better now. Though, sometimes things still confuse me" she admits sounding a bit wistful.

"That's fine. Things still confuse me and I'm from here" that gets a slight giggle. You keep up the rubbing. Slow circular motions. It was a trait you noticed in yourself several years ago. Whenever your father grabbed your lower back you had a tendency to relax more than you should have. Personal experimentation revealed a mild easing of tensions when probing it and subsequent biological scans uncovered a number of nerve endings in the area directly connected both to your brains pleasure centers and to the portions of your brain responsible for flight. Indeed, if you wanted a shortcut to fly you would often tense your lower back. Clearly it was a hold-over trait from your Tamaranean DNA.

The effect seems to be even more pronounced on a full-blooded Tamaranean. Perhaps something to do with the felid nature of their ancestors? Either way now is the time to start probing more deeply.

"Can you tell me about your relationship with Raven?"

"Oh yes ah Raven is a very good friend. She told me of her people's mmm mating customs and I was most glad to oh join with her." Well those moans weren't distracting at all.

"But you know it's different from Tamaranean mating right?"

She nods "Mm, yes. It is more permanent. And there are other restrictions on who may mate with whom. But otherwise it is the same." She seems a little...blissed out at the moment. Her eyelids fluttering as she's easily lead in a loop through the hallway.

"What about Robin? He'd been pursuing you in an earth style ritual for a lot longer right? How did he take it?"

For a moment Starfire's face contorts into a rictus of sadness and she offers a solitary whimper before resolving into a more stoic expression. You keep the back rub going strong as she responds.

"Robin was...disappointed. He could not understand the loving of more than one other. I had wished to make him see reason, but he fled before I could..."

"But you've also experienced that right?" Her eyebrows furrow as you speak.

"Remember Kitten?" a soft growl rumbles in her throat.

"She was going to take the Robin from us. An outsider. An invader"

"But you understand the feeling right? Imagine if Robin HAD actually wanted to be with her?" You note her hair almost standing up on end as she bristles with rage.

"I think that feeling there, is how Robin felt when he saw you with Raven." She deflates back down, the sadness returning and a haunted look entering her eye.

"That is..not the good feeling."

"No. But you wouldn't want anyone else to feel like that would you?"

She shakes her head.

You lick your lips as you get ready for the next part. "Why do you want more mates?"

"I am...lonely. Without Robin I'm...there is a space. Without Robin it is the empty. Robin filled it and now he is the gone. If he is not the coming back then I need someone there."

"I'm sorry you feel that way. That must be uncomfortable for you."

She nods along morosely. "When I think about it. When I think of the things we did and shared, it still the hurts."

"And Raven, what do you feel when you think of her?"

She's smiling again, practically glowing "It is the warmth and the quiet comfort. It is the softness and the new foods. It is the tenderness and the words that don't need to be said."

"Ok, well...she asked me to talk to you because she needs you to hear some words and she can't say them." Starfire seems confused.

"It's ok, everything will make sense in a moment." You push open the door and lead her out onto the rooftop of Titans Tower.

Raven is already there, hood off but with her cloak wrapped tightly around her.

You lead Starfire over and as you take your hand off her back it's like a spell has broken and she looks around furtively.

"Raven?" she questions "Why are we on the roof? And why is Dan the pizza guy relationship chancellor here?"

You give Raven a look signaling her to start.

She takes a breath, extending her hands and taking Starfires in her own. She looks at her, violet eyes meeting green. "Starfire. I love you." The alien girl smiles but you note the nervousness tickling at the corner of he face. "And...you know I'm not ready for another azarheth right now"

"Mate" you offer. Raven shoots you a dirty look, recentering herself before continuing. "But...I'm also not ready for you to have one either."

Starfire seems taken aback. "I. Do not understand. I thought...I thought I could now. You showed me how!"

"I know Star. And you can. It's just. We're still knew to this. And I don't want to lose you and you don't have a reason to do it right now." Crap. She's ad-libbing.

Starfire draws back a hand placing it to her forehead. You note the tremor and the shuddering. The wash of emotions on her face as she tries to process this. You see the tensing of the jaw and pulsating of the veins. Looks like she's settled on anger. Time for you to step in.

"Before you do anything Star" you begin, the alien girl staring at you with glowing green eyes. "Remember Kitten. Remember Robin." Her brow furrows. She's thinking back. Recalling you conversation "Right now, Raven is afraid that she's going to be left with that feeling." Her eyes widen. A combination of shock and fear as the glowing green energy vanishes from them.

"I do not. I do not understand" Starfire's grip on Raven's hand tightens. "You said what we had was permanent. That it would be the forever!"

"It is Star, I swear it is. But you're moving so fast and I'll always feel for you. But you're moving so quickly and I'm terrified you're going to forget all about me!" Moisture pools in Raven's eyes as she holds back tears, but she doesn't let go of Starfire.

"It is not like that Raven. You have the place in me. You ALWAYS have the place in me."

"Then why are you trying to find some el-"

"Raven!" She turns to you, the tears in her eyes beginning to overflow. "She still misses Robin. She still loves you. Still cares for you. But there was a space for him in her heart." She sniffles as you speak, holding back hiccups "And she's trying to fill it anyway she can" you finish.

Raven falls to her knees. Staring up at Starfire "I'm sorry Star. I'm so sorry." She's sobbing openly now. Muttering her apologies as best she can as Starfire embraces her. Sadness and confusion dancing across the alien girls face.

You kneel behind Raven so you can look Starfire in the face and say things in no uncertain terms. "Raven feels responsible for what happened with you and Robin. She feels guilty about what happened between you. And she's afraid to talk about it because she feels as though somehow it would taint your relationship."

Starfire stares at you for a moment before leaning back and facing Raven, placing hands on either side of her face. She leans in quickly, her lips mashing against Raven's. Her tongue dances between the sorceress lips and after a moment of stunned quietude, Raven reciprocates. Her own tongue dueling with the alien princesses and wrapping her arms around her nude body. Starfire's hands move grasping the back of Raven's head, running through the purple locks and trying to find any purchase to bring her closer.

An eternity passes before they break, both panting heavily as they stare into the others eyes.

"I know now the words you wish to say" Starfire begins. "And...I am also responsible for Robin's leaving. Had I told him sooner, had we sought his inclusion first, maybe things would not be as they are. But we cannot change what has happened."

Huh...you know it's easy to forget how insightful Starfire is with her general bubbliness. You'll need to remember that in the future.

"I will wait to take another mate until you are ready as well." Raven takes a shuddering breath as the two lean in close. Their foreheads touching as they share a private moment.

...Well you certainly feel like a third wheel now. You take a step back, both their eyes lock on you and suddenly it's more awkward than before. "I should uh-"

Without warning Starfire floats up, grabs your face and brings you in close. You feel the softness spread over your lips like warm splash of water. You feel her tongue probe your lips and you lean into it, moving to respond in kind-

And she's pulled away, floating there and smiling at you. Arms behind her back and generously displaying her assets. Why yes pants, you could indeed get even tighter.

"Thank you Dan the pizza delivery relationship chancellor."

"Counselor" Raven speaks up.

"That is what I said" she singsongs "Thank you for helping us. You have made us the closer and I am happy to show my gratitude to you."

Yes...gratitude. You take another step and you almost miss the quick peck on the cheek. You touch it and note Raven standing next to you blushing furiously.

"I'm...grateful too."

You smile and for a moment you just stand there. You feel...glad you guess. Something about all of this feels...right.

"Oh uh...I don't suppose I could get a tip by the way?"

...

You don't get a chance to tap into the mainframe before you leave, but that's fine. You managed to pick up contact information from both Raven and Starfire, as well as Cyborg and the small smattering of titan's you told stories to. Predictably you lose your job at The Pizza Place. You are unceremoniously de-hatted and your van stripped of its fin.

You're a little put out that you didn't get a chance to use the explosives in the van but you can always use them later.

As you stow the van and make your way back to your quarters you reflect upon the insights you gained. The titans have high morale at the moment, but their primary leader is out of commission. When he returns, he will find the relationship that drove him away stronger than ever and with any luck that should compromise his abilities further. You also have an "in" if you ever need to go back, and non-secure communication methods with a number of other titans that you can exploit.

Plopping down in front of your computer you pull out your cell phone and hook it up. Downloading the file you smile glad that you were able to record this secretly. A few quick clicks and the sight of Raven and Starfire kissing passionately pops up on your monitor. Oh yeah, that's the good stuff.

You're about to settle in and enjoy the show when the door to your quarter's swooshes open.

"Hello son."

Crap.