Ask Monica if she wants a coffee

"Hey Monica," you say, "want to grab a coffee?"

She looks at you. "What the hell. Why not?"

You head to a nearby coffee shop and order Monica the skinny latte she wants as well as a black coffee for yourself, then sit outside.

She's put her sweats back on which is more than a little disappointing. Then again, maybe you were a little obvious about staring at her boobs.

"That was a setup, wasn't it?" she demands.

"Huh?"

"You were faking being the total dweeb."

"Yeah, I got a weird haircut just so I could help Jackie win a bet."

"That does seem a little ****."

"Like, not happening. I'm a computer programmer. I sit around in the dark and commune with my computer. I cut my own hair."

"Wow. Maybe Jackie really can transform me."

"I'm sure she can. But listen, Monica, there's nothing wrong with you. Sure you could use a little toning and some sun but you're pretty and you've got a great figure."

"For a fat slob, you mean."

"Wow, you really do have some esteem problems, don't you? No, I mean you've got a great figure, period."

That taken care of, the two of you chat about work, Jackie's training (you do not mention that Jackie is working out with you for free), and living in the bay area. When you mention your streaming plans, though, she gets a worried look.

"You know that's blasphemous, right?"

"Huh?"

"The power of creation is reserved for God himself."

"Well, since God is supposed to be omnipotent and omniscient, it must be his intention to let it happen."

She gives you a brief and to you incoherent lecture on free will... ignoring your explanation that there can't be free will in a universe where an omniscient being already knows every choice that will be made. Finally she stands up and crosses her arms in front of the chest you were busy admiring.

"I worry about you, Mike," she says. "There are a lot of people less open-minded than me. They won't understand that you're trying to do good and will come after you."

"I'll be careful," you promise.

"I think you're laughing at me but I'm serious."

"I know you are."

After what had been a pleasant date, marred by a rather strange ending, you head back home to figure out what else to do with your day.