A creepy? or endearing? message

A few normal notifications of reminders and alerts for all my usual things and then there was a message from Cassi.

Cassi: Hey gorgeous! Are you free tonight my date bailed *sad face* and I’m sad so can I come over yours tonight? *heart*.

I responded right away

Chloe: You had a DATE!?!??? ofc you can stay over. I need details!

Cassi: Yeah “had” is the word, I really like him, but he ditched on plans so idk. I’ll explain it all tonight anyway.

Chloe: Can’t wait, bring snacks *winky face*.

Cassi: Haha yea I will. CU at around 6… actually 7 maybe. Idk sometime after dinner probs.

Chloe: OK ttyl ILY. *heart*

(Don't judge me because I text like I'm 13, okay!)

I finally pull myself out of bed and started getting ready for the day, starting with washing, makeup and hair. As I was finishing up, I noticed a notification on Twitter, which is weird because I barely use it. It was a DM from someone with a fantasy character art profile pic. Their name was... Jack. I took a moment, wondering if I knew a Jack and then I realised, and my heart skipped a beat or dropped or... exploded, I don't know, but something terrifying surged through me and I hoped to God that it was not who I thought it might be.

I clicked on my Twitter profile in horror, scrolling through to see if anywhere in my bio or posts I had mentioned I was trans. Other than retweeting and posting what I would call 'a metric Fuck-tonne' of LGBTQ stuff nothing seemed glaringly obvious. She/Her in my bio and... oh no... trans flag, of course. My immediate response was to delete it but I stopped. I am not changing who I am for some guy I don't know. I didn't know whether it was a good or bad thing either. Maybe he had seen it, tracked me down and wanted to rant at me about tricking him or maybe—and far more likely—this guy is like 40? Does he even know what that flag means... Regardless, heaps of people I know put flags in there bio purely to show support who was to say that I hadn't also.

My mind raced and my heart hurt. I don't know why but I was panicked about it. The thought of being found out, somehow terrified me. I surround myself with supportive people to avoid this entirely. I really am not in the mood to be bashed by some guy I don't even know.

Also, if it was the same guy, he was the weirdo looking me up from a dating app where I didn't even respond to him. I think back to his profile... He was so my type though—whatever that was—and he seemed genuinely interested in me, or the 'penisless' female version of, at least. I swallowed and calmed myself. I didn't even know if it was him or what he or they wanted anyway. I clicked the message and read in horror.

Jack: Hey, before you block me, I understand this looks creepy and/or **** but please hear me out and then if you don't respond, I will leave you alone. I am Jack, you sent me a heart on the ‘Clix’ dating app. I sent you a message and you didn't respond but I noticed your profile was also gone. Yeah.... don't worry as I'm writing this, I'm realising you might have blocked me or got together with someone and got rid of the app.... Anyway, I just need to make sure. I’m going to be completely honest here; you are like the best person I've come across on that app and I would be a fool to not at least try my luck. You are (in so many ways) way too far out of my league but your photos and what you wrote about yourself on your profile really connected with me and somehow you still sent that heart... unless it was a mistake... oh boy. Anyway, I am well aware that this looks like 'creep' behaviour, I assure you I am not a creep. I have just had your profile on my mind for the last few days and thought the worst thing that can happen from at least _trying _to get in contact is that you're not interested and then I'm in the exact same place, so... that's it. I'm here one last time to say that if there was anything that made you send that heart, I'd love the chance to show you more. Jack.

The urge to reply immediately was crazy. He was right. It _was _weird and it _is _creepy behaviour, but still, seeing someone so desperately try to get to know me sent a shiver down my spine and filled me with excitement. I didn't know until now, just how much I really _did _want someone to share things with, give me compliments and check in on my day because they genuinely care. I’m not saying this random guy is that guy for me but...

I wanted to reply. I just don't know how to navigate these things. I want to know... I want to know whether all guys run for the hills or do some stay? I mean, he clearly thinks I'm a girl, which I am... but obviously, with me, that comes with some... caveats. I daydreamed about telling him and having him sweep me off my feet and straight into his bed before I was snapped out of it when I noticed that I was in the reply section to the message. Freaking out, I closed Twitter and threw my phone. I don't use Twitter... would it tell him I've read his message? Would it look like I was typing? I panic-cleaned my entire house in a ridiculous state of distress at this simple thing.