(Chapter IV.I) A Foe With Big Tits?

The latest Dark Mercenary wriggles out from beneath your grip, the corners of her eyes smudged from the lost fight.

“How many of you must I beat before I can level up?” you grumble. “I don’t even want to fuck you lot anymore, you dumb non-virgins that can’t even come up with new, witty dialogue.”

“You could fight others,” the Dark Mercenary says darkly.

A shaft of moonlight sets an ominous glow to her face.

“But who is there to fight? I’ve beat both you and the Maiden Thieves, and believe me, while I’d love to go back into town and beat up the old grannies there, they don’t have any good loot.”

“That’s on you to figure out then,” the Dark Mercenary says. With a swish and a swoosh, she disappears into the night. Out of the dark air, a crisp piece of paper slowly floats down to the ground. You pick it up, and find a rough hand-drawn sketch of a lady. She looks fierce, with a huge blade, and she also happens to have huge tits.

“This can’t be real,” you mutter, but it’s just then that a light spills down from above.

“OF COURSE IT IS REAL,” the Good Lord Nicolas Cage says, his voice booming down from above. “I MADE EVERYTHING IN THIS WORLD THAT IS GOOD, INCLUDING HER J-CUP TITS.”

“Who is she?” you ask, suddenly **** for a chance to “meet” her.

“SHE IS THE ONE WHO LEADS THE DARK MERCENARIES IN THEIR RAIDS AGAINST THE COMMON PEOPLE! YOU MUST FIND HER AND BRING HER TO JUSTICE.”

“Can I bring her to justice with the use of a hard cock?” you ask.

It is a very natural question to ask.

“I HAVE PLENTY OF HARD COCKS YOU CAN MAKE USE OF, IF YOU SO REQUIRE. JACKSON OVER HERE IS A ROOSTER THAT RATES A 9 ON MOHS HARDNESS SCALE, SO HE SHOULD DO THE TRICK NICELY.”

“No, I meant my schlong,” you say, pointing out your member for your Lord to see.

“HMM… I SEE WHAT YOU MEAN. WELL, IF YOU CAN MANAGE IT, THEN I’LL ACCEPT IT,” the Lord Cage says. “BUT I STILL THINK JACKSON WILL DO A BETTER JOB.”

“I’ll keep that in mind, my Lord,” you say, bowing in supplication. You note as you bend over that you are still not flexible enough to suck your own cock. Something to work on, then.

“VERY WELL, SEE YOU LATER, HAVE FUN, MAKE SURE TO KILL A COUPLE MORE DARK MERCENARIES FOR ME SO THAT YOU CAN LEVEL UP!”

“Why can’t I level up already?” you complain, but the Heavens snap shut and the Holy Light dissipates, and you’re left alone with the sketch of the lady with the J-cup tits.