"You call this 'cheerleading'?"

"Do you call this cheerleading," Jackie demands. "I call it fraternizing with the enemy."

"Hi." Barbara sticks out her hand. "I'm Barbara."

"Jackie," Jackie shakes it. Both women flinch and you guess they're playing that stupid handshake squeeze game. You didn't think girls did that. Are they fighting over you? Talk about an ego boost.

"Barbara is a co-worker from my former employer," you say. "Jackie is my trainer and date."

"Oh," Jackie drops the handshake. "Nice to meet you, I guess."

"Nice to meet you, too. You're an awesome pitcher. Why don't you come play for us instead?"

"They asked first."

"Oh, looks like I'm wanted on the field." Barbara grabs her glove and heads for the shortstop position.

"So," Jackie demands. "What do you have to say for yourself?"

"I saw an acquaintance and said hi. And did a little spying on my former employer to figure out why they're blackballing me."

"I did see you getting her phone number, you know."

"Yeah, she may know more."

She punches you on the arm. "Don't kid a kidder. Did you see how hot she is? I mean, of course you did. You're a straight male. You never look at a girl without wondering what it would be to fuck them, do you?"

"Uh, can I take the fifth?"

"All I can say is, if you really want to get into my pants, bring Barbara with you."

"Are you serious?"

"Oh, yeah. I like guys but I'm crazy about girls."

That is a mental image you wish you could print out and jerk off over. Unfortunately, you are pretty sure it'll remain nothing but a mental image. "I worked with her for years and she never noticed me."

"Well, it's just possible that you're a new person... thanks in part to my brilliant coaching, I might add. Because the way she was looking at you said she was noticing fine. Oh, looks like I'm up next. Talk to you soon."

You spend the next hour and a half checking out the girls. It definitely seems that being sporty gives girls a sensuality you hadn't really noticed before. Every single one of the twenty girls (they play with a shortfielder making ten person teams) is worth a second... and third long look.

Barbara surprises you in the field, scooping up what you're certain should be sure hits and rifling throws to first base to put out runners. Jackie makes sure she can't do that when she's up to bat cannoning a pair of home runs and a triple in her three at-bats. Those two runs, plus Jackie's pitching, keep Jackie's team in the game until the last inning where, thanks to a fielding error and a weak throw, Barbara's team scores three runs and wins.

"You were awesome," you tell Jackie.

"We lost. Now buy me a pitcher of beer."

"I can do that."

The two teams congratulate each other and head to their separate bars.