The Rookie Adventurer

The Rookie Adventurer

The quest to get laid

Chapter 1 by conkers024 conkers024

"Today is the day!" You shamelessly shout into the wind as your family looks on uncomfortably. You ignore their judgmental stares. After years of preparation, you're finally ready to leave your small frontier village and travel to the city to register as an adventurer. For two summers, you worked your elderly neighbor's fields just to learn sword combat from a retired soldier. You spent the autumn with the best hunters in the village learning advanced techniques to aid you against any beast you may encounter. You sold the rabbits and boars you brought back to purchase a cheap set of leather armor. Finally just a fortnight ago you sold the small parcel of land your great-uncle had left you to purchase a fine iron sword from a traveling vendor. All the struggles and sacrifice were worth it however as you're finally ready to leave the confines of the village in search of a life as an adventurer.

"But son, what do you hope to find out there?" Your father asks.

"You have a family here who loves you, an inheritance, and land to provide for you!" Your older sister shouts in between her tears.

"Yes, but there is one thing I will never obtain if I were to stay here." You say as you stare into the horizon. Your eyes focus as the sun slowly rises into the morning sky, bathing you all in a golden glow of light. "And for that one thing, I am prepared to sacrifice everything I have..."

"Adventure?" Your younger brother asks.

"Pussy, my naive sibling. I shall wander the land in search of pussy. From the forests full of slender elf maidens, to the beds of seductive succubi and ponds of mermaids with the thickest hips you could imagine boy."

"Mermaids don't have a pussy. Their bottom halves are fish." Your brother points out.

"They have mouths!" You scream at him. "and breasts you could squeeze together should the need arise."

"Why can't you just meet a nice girl here?" Your sister pleads.

" They've all turned me down already-and that's not the point! I've no interest in simple farm girls when a world of possibilities awaits me!"

After a bit more back and forth with your family, you finally set off on the small dirt road to the city. You ride your trusty burro, Reuben for hours before you connect onto the Imperial road where you stop to have a small lunch of cheese and fruit. You nearly on a peach pit but a strike of Reuben's foot on your back sends the pit bouncing down the cobblestone road. Another half day's travel and you arrive in the city. A helpful guard directs you toward the guild hall, located next to a small inn.

You pay a small fee and the Guild receptionist helps you fill out an adventurer's card. You register as a warrior and she tells you you'll be able to register into more advanced classes once you've gained some experience. She explains the card will act as a passport allowing you to freely travel between cities and kingdoms, it will also provide a 15% discount on all meals at local guild halls. She points you toward the quest board where you may undertake any quests befitting your rank of rookie. She also recommends you gather a party to take on some of the more difficult quests.

What to do first? Form a party? take a quest? hit the brothel?

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