Trying to be Normal Again

Thump, thump, thump, thump.

I hear my father's slow heavy footfalls as he comes down the stairs. His stride was plodding and even hesitant. He was surely dreading this first, sure to be excruciatingly awkward, encounter between us since our nighttime adventure.

My heart was beating and my breath caught in my throat. I honestly had no idea what to expect. I didn't know what I would say or what he would say. I can only pray for the best.

Thump, thump, thump.

His foot steps go quiet as he hits floor level. I wait anxiously, checking over the plate I had made for him a third time to make sure everything was picture perfect.

He appears in the hallway, standing just outside the kitchen. His large form fills the entry and I am immediately struck with a bolt of powerful arousal. He looked good! Real good. The morning light reflecting up off the white tile floor gave his handsome bearded face a warm radiance. The little bit of gray in his beard and hair made him look so dashing and distinguished. He was already dressed and ready to go out. He wore slate black trousers and a nice cobalt blue collared shirt. His sleeves were rolled up to just below his elbows revealing his thick hairy forearms. The top button of the shirt was undone allowing a little glimpse of his upper chest. God he filled out those clothes so damn well.

I could see right away that the anger from the night before was long gone. In its place was shame and resentment. It killed me seeing him like this. I never meant to hurt him.

It also bothered me that I wasn't feeling the same. Where was my shame? Where was my regret? It stung that I'd hurt my father, but for the taboo act itself...nothing. No guilt or remorse. Quite the opposite. I LOVED the fact that it had happened! What the hell was wrong with me? I push those those thoughts from my mind.

There is a moment of tense silence before he says. “I'm going out.” His piercing blue eyes were focused on a random spot on the wall off to my right. He didn't even want to look at me and that broke my heart. He turns to go.

“Wait!” I say. “Wait...I, uh, I made you breakfast.”

He peers back over his wide shoulder. I motion towards the perfectly arranged plate I had so painstakingly put together. He thinks about it then shakes his head and turns away. “I gotta go.”

“Dad, I made it for you.”

He takes a step toward the front door.

“Daddy...please.” I say softly. “I need us to be normal again. I'm sorry. Please stay.”

Silence.

I grip my hands nervously. “I love you Daddy. I didn't mean for it... I...don't know what I can say. How can I fix this? I'm sorry. Please. I'm so sorry.”

I watch his shoulders rise and fall as he takes in then lets out a big breath. His head bows and all goes quiet. The pause seems to stretch on forever. Finally, mercifully, he straightens up once more and nods his head. Turning back he enters the kitchen and takes a seat at the breakfast bar. At no point does he actually look at me.

“Smells good.” He says in a low quiet voice.

I smile brightly.

I hurry to take his plate and serve it out in front of him. I bring him a knife and fork then go to pour him a freshly brewed mug of coffee. Cream and lots of sugar just like he likes it. Daddy likes it sweet. As I rush around to serve him I am suddenly keenly aware that I wore only the long t shirt nightie. This was not unusual for the morning just hanging around the house but after what had happened the night before I realized I should have worn something more concealing. The shape of my titties were easy to discern through the thin well worn cotton and if I moved suddenly the wrong way there was a chance my butt might peek out, never mind the fact my bare legs were almost completely exposed.

'Way to go Fawn, way to put him at ease.' I sarcastically berate myself. 'Dumb, dumb, dumb!'

As I spin back toward him, his warm coffee mug in my slender hands, I just catch him looking in my direction. His eyes snap back down to his plate. Was...he looking at my ass!? Was he checking me out!? I can feel my nipples harden with arousal before I shake my head. No, of course he wasn't checking me out! I was being such a silly girl.

I bring him his coffee then pull up a stool beside his. As I get a whiff of his cologne a flood of memories from the night before fill my mind.

I take a breath and settle my wild libido. Sitting quietly I watch him eat the food I prepared for him. You could cut the tension with a knife. It was as if there was a vast distance between us though he sat within arm's length. It had never been like this before. I remind myself that this was my fault. I allowed the thing to happen and now I had to accept the consequences. But he was here eating my food, it was a start.

Dad peeks over at me as he chews on some scrambled eggs. “Not eating?”

I shake my head. “I made this for you. To make up for last night.” I cringe. That wasn't what I meant to say! As if a breakfast could make up for committing the ultimate taboo. I was messing this up. I was so damned nervous I didn't know if I was coming or going.

“Make up for...!?” He lets out huff. I watch his face flinch and the grip on his fork tighten. “We don't talk about that.” He says in a low serious tone. “We never EVER talk about that.”

“Yes Daddy.” I whisper meekly. “I'm sorry. I love you Dad.”

He sighs again and I sense the nervous energy drain from his hulking body. “I love you too Kitten.”

Tears well up in my eyes. He used his nickname for me! That single word did more to put my mind at ease than any long eloquent speech ever could. I can't hide the smile that comes to my face. Wiping the tears from my eyes I settle in and quietly watch him once more. He called me Kitten. Everything was going to be okay.