There are two notes on the floor. Maybe read them?

Kenny opened the door to no one being there. He looked both ways, before noticing on the floor a pair of sealed envelopes. He brought them inside his room, and sat down on his bed to open them. He started with one with the waviest handwriting.

"To Frederick.

Apologies for the accident three months ago. I could have sworn that the teleporter was in perfect working order. You'll be pleased to know the fire was under control very shortly after you passed out. You left the laboratory claiming that you were never going to set foot in here again, but I thought you and my other former assistants might change your mind when you see what I've been working on since your departure. I have some excellent experiments and inventions to show you all, and they'll be ready at 8PM tonight. Do be sure to come over, and please let Simon know. He hasn't unlocked his doors since the monkey experiment went catastrophically wrong, but I assured him that his feet would become humanlike again in due time.

Hope to work with you again soon!

Aria."

This....was clearly not for him. But there hadn't been a Frederick in the dorms for at least two months since he left, saying something about explosions and terror. Kenny may have just discovered where that had all come from. He reached out and opened the second letter.

"Yo Jeremy, it's Roger here. We've got a bodacious party all set up down at mine at 8PM tonight. You won't believe some of the babes we've got lined up. I know you've got that whole "marriage" shit going on now, but I thought you'd want to get in on this action, brah. Don't be a pussy. Just say the secret password "Jagerbomb" at the door and you'll be let in, no matter who you are. Even if, I dunno, some nerd showed up, just saying this password would let him get in no worries. Not that that'll ever happen, but ya know.

P.S: Is your sister still mad that I cheated on her? I told her I have visual dyslexia and can't tell two chicks apart, but I don't think she bought it."

Again, this is not for Kenny. Great. Wonderful. Two incredible situations completely ripe for all sorts of misadventures, and neither one of them are actually for him. Who the hell is Jeremy meant to be? There had literally never been a Jeremy since Kenny joined the dorms. Whoever had delivered this one must have absolutely drunk off their tits.

Well screw it, Kenny wouldn't normally be so bold, but if he was going to get invited to two different places, he was gonna show up to at least ONE of them, whether he was meant to or not. The only question was, which one to go to...also, how to kill the time until 8PM, but that one was easy. Like most Kenny's life problems, the solution was video games and porn.