The Right Man For The Job

"John" Jane said as she moved from behind her desk, "I know all about you. You've not held a job for more than 8 months. You only have a high school education where you graduated with a C average. Your credit score is terrible. You've only had a few girlfriends; the longest relationship only lasting two months. You're down to your last $20 in your bank account and you have no other job prospects on the horizon. I think it's fair to say John Doe, that you're a loser, is that right?"

You were stunned. She just pierced right through any armor you had. She was absolutely right. Why was she saying this though? What the hell kind of interview is this? In your state of shock all you could do is nod your head in agreement.

"Glad we agree. John, our IT department has hacked into your computer. It seems you're into some very kinky things. They found instances of you watching BDSM porn, **** porn, just about every type of alternative or fetish porn was found in your internet history. Is that right?"

What the hell? They hacked your internet history? You were sure now this interview was bullshit. Maybe a prank show or something like that. You didn't answer, you simply made your way up to exit the office. Jane quickly stepped in front of the door.

"John, I'm not saying these things to shame you. I'm saying these things because these are the attributes that make you perfect for the job."

"Huh?" you responded. "Sit back down and give me 15 minutes. All will become clear I promise." She batted her eyelashes in such a way that you felt like you were melting. You quickly retook your seat.

"John, before I can explain the job, I need to explain what Bellsvelle College is and it's history."