Try the yellow potion

“I’ll try the one that looks like ale!” you say lunging forward to grab it.

“Hey that’s not ale! That’s science!” the strange man says slightly offended. You chug back the yellow liquid and it tastes like ale mixed with… something very bubbly?

“Tastes like ale to me.” You retort.

“Okay fine maybe it’s science ale. But we don’t know what it does yet.” He seems to eye you up and down looking for changes of some sort. He scribbles something down on parchment. Suddenly your vision begins to go in and out of focus. You stumble and grab an alley wall before lowering yourself to the ground. An amazing weightless feeling comes across you as everything around you looks more vibrant.

“Woah-hoho this is aweeeesome.” You say looking at your hands.

“Oh, it’s this one… this is gonna be a minute. I’ll swing back by sometime soon.” He says before awkwardly stepping out of the alley. Your body feels so weird! You touch your chest and legs to confirm they’re still there. After what feels like seconds two hooded figures approach from down the alley. Still absorbed by the pretty colors around you, you can hear what they say but your brain doesn’t process it.

“Huh this must be her. Thought she’d be less uh, high.” The tall one says.

“Sis are you sure this is right?” the smaller one says.

“It’s lawful evil at best but we don’t really have a choice. How would we pay off Geadric otherwise?” The smaller one seems to shift uncomfortably at this but nods. You feel their deft hands go to work searching your person.

“Hehehe that tickles.” You say drunkenly. The small one pulls out your coin pouch handing it to the other one. The tall one opens it and looks at its contents.

“I’m not sure that’s enough… We’ll need the rest.” She says looking to the small one. The small one gasps but speaks.

“O-okay.” They get to work once more as they take your shield and weapon. The real fun begins when they start pulling off your armor. You can’t help but laugh along at the funny hands that pull at you. They manage to take off all but your cotton underwear. During the scuffle you accidently knock the smaller one’s hood off revealing her face. She’s a beautiful young half elf girl with blue hair. Her eyes seem to sparkle as she looks back at you. You grab her face and speak softly to her.

“Woahhh you’re beautiful.” You feel her face warm up as it turns red in your hand. The tall figure slaps your hand away before sighing.

“Gonna want these too. Could make a decent profit from some weirdos.” She says pulling off your last line of defence. Your entire naked body is on display in this alley now as the two thieves retreat back onto the main street. If anyone happened by you in such a secluded location, they could probably get away with doing whatever they wanted… You don’t care about that right now as you ride out the rest of your high before passing out.