Cold and hunger

I’d hoped to have empty, dreamless sleep, the kind where I couldn’t remember anything, and was gently carried away. Instead, I had strange and vivid dreams again, dreams of wandering a snowy wasteland, my body wasted away into taut skin around a skeleton, always walking towards a fire in the distance surrounded by celebrating people, yet never able to grow closer than I was in that moment. It felt like this dream and the unpleasant sensations I felt in it would go on forever, but cold and hunger in the real world **** me awake sooner.

I opened my eyes to my dark and messy room, the curtains drawn, keeping all but a few stray sunbeams out of the place. I was shivering, and hungrier than I'd felt in a long, long time. I suppose I hadn’t eaten since going to the diner with Lisa yesterday, so I would be hungry. A lot of adrenaline had been used up too, which can’t have helped.

I looked over at my clock and saw it was 1pm; Looks like I’d missed the mornings classes. Sitting up out of my covers I was immediately reminded of how cold I was, and pulled on my warmest sweater as I trudged over to the sink in the corner to brush my teeth.

A glance over my reflection revealed I looked like absolute shit. My skin was paler than ever, the bags under my eyes pronounced, and my eyes were a little bloodshot too. Honestly, I looked sick, and I didn’t feel much better. Spitting out the toothpaste I wandered to the communal kitchen I shared with my flatmates, the sound of cooking and laughter perking me up just a little.

Opening the door I found Alicia and Frank cheerily discussing music that had released that weekend, Frank cooking a fry up while Alicia made coffee. I went to my cupboard to get some stale cereal.

“Morning Alex!”

Beamed Alicia initially, before changing her tone a little.

“Whoa, you really don’t look so good. You’re getting the extra strength today.”

She helpfully began filling another cup.

Alicia was a cheerful girl with a real “girl next door appeal”, but she still felt fresh rather than just some stereotype. Natural, honey blonde hair and simple, colorful styles were her staples, and even though she more often than not just wore casual oversized vintage T-shirts and daisy dukes, it was still clear she was gorgeous. She didn’t have the biggest breasts, but her B-Cups still looked great, and her warm, cheerful smile, natural light tan and tight waist more than made her a catch.

“Put the cereal down, let me get you some real food cooked up.”

Commented Frank, noticing how emancipated I looked.

Frank was a big guy, muscular and fit, and he made a point of working out a lot. On top of that he was a really nice guy, quiet until you got to know him, but really caring, sensitive and charming in a straightforward, honest way once you had. Really these two made the perfect couple, and they’d been together since high school and didn’t show any signs of falling out of love yet.

“Ahh guys, you’re too kind, I don’t want to be a bother…”

I started, before Alicia cut me off.

“Nonsense! What’s ours is yours, flatmates gotta look out for each other, especially when someone looks a little like he’s been sleeping in a dumpster for days.”

I appreciated the kindness, but did I really look that bad? I accepted the food graciously and started wolfing it down though, my own hunger seeming to take over as soon as the plate was set in front of me.

“I’m guessing the date didn’t go quite like you’d planned?”

Frank inquired, sitting across from me and sipping his coffee. In between bites, I managed to reply;

“Umm... well… I guess it just was very surprising. It didn’t go in a way I would have ever expected.”

Talk about understatement of the century. On top of the harrowing events of last night, I was left completely hanging when it came to Lisa. I’m not sure I could look at her the same way after what had happened, and more than that, who even knew if I’d asked Lisa out in the first place? I could have been crushing on a monster the whole time, the real her just it's outfit. She might not even know who I am, depending on when she got taken over. It came a close second for most depressing realizations in my life recently.

“Oh well, chin up anyway!”

Alicia, trying as ever to cheer me up.

“Listen, if it wasn’t to be, it wasn’t to be. There’s plenty more fish in the sea! And look on the bright side, it’s so gorgeous and warm today! I don’t think we’ll need a jacket or anything, it might even get too hot for long sleeves altogether. And guess what, we’re even having a party here tonight, so you’ll be able to drown your sorrows, dance the night away, and who knows, you might even go home with someone totally unexpected!”

Well… I suppose a party could be just what I need. I felt completely miserable now, but drinking, friends, staying up late. It was all part of the college experience. And I was still me too! I deserved to have a little fun.

“Alicia’s right.”

Smiled Frank,

“You’ll have a blast, get your mind off things. Although, you should definitely clean that pan you left sitting in the sink. Jessica was getting extremely pissed about it. Better not to give her a reason to start something. She was actually going to barge into your room and harass you about it earlier, but her personal trainer called about something so she headed off before she could.”

“Oh Frank, by the way, we have to run. They’re having a sale on red cups and liquor so we’d better get down there before the place sells out!”

At that, they both headed out, leaving me alone to scrub my pan and ponder what I’d do with my day.