The Truth

The following morning is a blur. Shower, clothes, breakfast, make-up, I don't remember what order. What weighs on my mind is my first lesson. Yeah, I checked for once. Science.

I take my seat in the corner alongside an empty chair. I wonder. Will she dare come and sit next to me? Will she apologise? Will she try to explain. Of course not. Elise is marked as absent. Doesn't even bother to face me. After all that, she's the one avoiding me? That bitch. She should be on her knees for what she did me. Apologising. Begging me for forgiveness... Anything.

Science washes over me, I notice Rouge attends, but makes no attempt to speak to me. Good. Last thing I need. Eventually the lesson ends and I find myself walking to the cafeteria out of instinct. And that's when I see her. The one person who never led me wrong. The only one that was on my side. The only one who never tried to hurt me.

"Come with me." I order Trish.

"Oh, hey! I'm just finishing up, I've got a class but-"She begins.

"Now." I insist, grabbing her hand and pulling her out of the canteen. I lead her to the history department bathroom, they're so out of the way no one uses them. Just in case, I also lock the door.

"Okay, what did you want to talk about?" Trish asks, her big brown eyes full of concern.

"I didn't say I want to talk." I answer, honestly.

I push my body into hers, my hands to her face, my lips to hers. She seems surprised for a few seconds until eventually she reciprocates and it all comes rushing back. The feeling of pleasure, the passion, the taste of liquorice. This is how it's meant to be. No more pain, just her body on mine. I need more. I push her into the wall behind here and pin her arms to it.

Breaking off the kiss, I press my mouth into the side of her neck, first just gently kissing, the sucking, then I lose control and bite at her flesh, pulling increasingly intense moans from her mouth. She grabs the bottom of her school polo and throws it off, revealing her bra-clad breasts. I don't hesitate in following suit and removing my own, causing her to immediately begin kissing along my collarbone. Each time her lips hit my flesh is like an electric shock through my system, jolting from my chest to between my legs and back again.

I take advantage of my free hands to undo her purple bra, and yank it from her. Her tits are like everything I ever imagined them to be, along with everything I never knew I wanted. They're as big as I knew them to be, but their firmness and brown nipples fit her body and skin tone perfectly. I can't hold back, I immediately press my face into her right nipple, firmly sucking on it, while massaging her left. The sounds she makes almost make me orgasm right there.

"Fuck... Yes... Scarlet..."

Damn right. I decide to press the advantage and reach for the top of her trousers, unbuttoning them and lowering the zip, treating my fingers to the feel of her damp knickers, and causing Trish to moan again.

"Wait... Wait, stop."

Huh? Did I do something wrong?

"Just, slow down a minute." Trish asks, regaining her breath. "You storm out of Elise's place, I don't hear from you for two days, then you drag me into a bathroom and fuck me? I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining, but I feel like I'm missing some context."

Damn it Trish. I just can't catch a break, can I?

"Does it matter? I'm here with you, aren't I?" I insist. Knowing full well Trish would never accept that.

"Tell you what, if you can convince me that you want to fuck me purely out of desire for me, I'll do whatever you want. Trust me, right now, I hope you do, but something tells me that's not the case." She retorts. Fuck. Now I'm messing with her feelings. How am I the good one in this situation? Guess there's no claiming the moral high ground.

So I explain, I explain meeting Elise and my feelings for her, my feelings for Trish, the events of the party, and the aftermath. Along the way it becomes more obvious what Trish knew and didn't. My sexuality, Rouge's plans, and Elise's request and subsequent objections were all news to her, but she never interrupts, instead accepting openly, like she trusts whatever I say without thinking about it.

"Lust." Trish announces decisively. "That's what you feel for me, lust, it's the same way I feel for you, it's all passion and desire, it's not real. I feel it for loads of people, you, Elise, Rouge, Jenny, Henry, Gabriel, fuck, even Amanda."

"I think you've listed nearly everyone we know." I point out, holding back a laugh.

"What can I say? I'm friendly!" She responds with a wink. "In all seriousness, I've been a card-carrying bisexual for years, never had sex with a girl either though. Guess I ruined that for both of us by stopping, huh?" Wow. She just said it. Like nothing. Trish really is way braver than me. "Then again, it was probably partly my fault you felt like you couldn't come out anyway. I guess I've got some making up to do... Not like that though!" She adds, retrieving her bra.

"I wish I wanted to do more than fuck you!" I apologise as I put my polo shirt back on. Wait. Was that an apology? Man, I'm bad at this.

"Same!" Laughs Trish. "But, I don't think you're in a place where sex can be no-strings, so I think we'd both regret acting on lust. Besides, we've got work to do."

Work? What's there to do? Everything's fucked.

"Come on." Trish implores, now fully clothed. "I don't know how to figure out everything that's happened, but I know who will."

*

Rouge's slap hits my face with more **** than Amanda's ever did. We're lucky the library is empty. PE was cancelled on account of a storm so we came straight to her. Can't say I don't deserve it after what I said. Can't say I really deserve her help. It's not like-

I'm cut off by Rouge's hug.

"I told you. No more solo runs." She whispers. I don't deserve her. I hug my sister like I should have for years. "Now, sit down and tell me every detail, because at the minute, nothing makes sense."

I mean, it makes sense to me, I came on to a straight girl, she told me to fuck off, but I guess. I explain what happened in the living room, what Elise said, and everything after.

"Well, I can see you two didn't stop too early." Rouge mocks, looking to Trish. A purple mark has formed on her neck where I bit her. Oops? "But walk me through what she said again, word for word."

"If you insist, not like I'm going to forget." I reply flippantly, "I'm straight. I don't like women. Last night was drunken stupidity. I didn't like it. I'm not implying you did, but I'm straight. I'm sorry. I just needed to say that to you. Out loud."

Rouge is quiet for a minute, her face scrunched up, as if unravelling a knot.

"What she's saying doesn't make sense." Rouge concludes.

"Seemed to make a lot of sense when she was saying it." I respond. "Not a lot of double meaning in saying 'I'm straight.' Twice."

"That's my point." Answers Rouge. "She said it twice. Unprompted. Three times if you count. 'I don't like women,' like she's pre-empting an argument. And how did you get that she knew you were gay?" She continued. It's not that I doubt Rouge's people skills, but it feels like even she's not sure what point she's making with the detective work.

"I dunno, I guess it was implied? Why else would she shut me down like that? The whole 'I just needed to say that to you.' part kinda says it's because of me." I reply. Rouge's face scrunches up again for a minute, until it switches to shock, then realisation, then anger.

"I'm going to fucking kill you when this is over." She states unflinchingly. "You've been looking at this backwards. You spent so long with your insecurities you forgot anyone else had any." I know she's right, but this isn't explaining anything. "Elise isn't saying she's not gay, she's trying to convince you of it, so you don't suspect it. you thought you'd fucked everything up, so did she!"

Okay, this isn't explaining anything.

"Think back, you do all that stuff, and then you just leave? Elise assumed you were straight, just like you assumed she knew you were a lesbian. So she feels bad and tries to fix it by apologising and saying how straight she is too. That's why she said how she wasn't implying you liked it, and even said sorry. Then you fly off the handle, so who knows what she thinks now?" Rouge explains. Her words are reassuring, but there's no proof, she's just guessing at double meanings.

"Trust me." She continues. "I think she's new to these feelings, I wouldn't be surprised if she's never felt like this towards a girl before. Think about it, if you started fancying a guy right now, but you weren't sure, and then you think he's found out, what would you do?" Shit. That's a good point. I'd deny it until it went away or became obvious, I'd try and protect myself. "Hence why she really hammered home how straight she was, not just to convince you, but to convince herself. the lady doth protest too much."

Fuck. If she's giving me false hope I'm becoming a nun.

"Did you figure all that out right now?" Trish asks, clearly impressed.

"It's not hard, once you figure out these two are the world's worst communicators." Rouge states confidently. "The real hint was the implication that I could ever be wrong." She adds, looking down to the book she was reading when we arrived.

"Once again, very sorry." I reiterate. "Don't suppose you could spare some infinite wisdom as to what I do now?" I ask, at this point I'll take anything. Rouge looks back at me as if I'd asked in Double Dutch.

"Oh, gee, hard to say, I suppose you could give up and mope about it, or, you could just go meet her, kiss the girl, everyone claps, and we can all move on?" Rouge replies with a level of sarcasm that exceeds even her usual level. "I text her yesterday and said I'd bring back her clothes over lunch, I'm meant to meet her at the bus stop near that hairdresser, go do something right for once."

"How'd you get her to agree to that? She hasn't picked up when I've tried to call her." Trish inquires, a hint of offense in her voice.

"Threatened to sell her knickers to the football team." Rouge answers blankly, not bothering to look up from her book.

"Well, that'd work. So, need a lift?" Trish chuckles, dangling her keys in front of me.

*

After picking up the clothes, Trish drives us towards the hairdresser from yesterday. I can't help but appreciate how selfless Trish has been, whether it's from guilt or friendship. Makes my actions kind of irredeemable.

"Hey, I'm sorry again, for the whole, trying to seduce you thing." I admit, not like it makes it better.

"Trying? Girl, if I didn't pick up on something being off we'd still be on that bathroom floor!" She laughed. "I wouldn't worry, my parents are always trying to marry me off, but, well, I guess you could call me a more free spirit, not really looking to get tied down, it's better that you like Elise." She continued. I guess there is a nice way to reject someone. Through hypotheticals. "If you want to make it up to me, you could always put in a good word with Rouge for me!"

Well, that's new. "You can't get with me, so you want my twin sister?" I grin awkwardly.

"Oh, no, other way around, you were the substitute!" Trish jokes. I think.

"Pretty sure she's straight, sorry." I inform her, not sure if she's serious or trying to calm my nerves.

"Well, maybe, but there's something we do have in common." Trish retorts. "We both like a challenge!" She concludes with a wink in my direction. I can't help but laugh, until her next words bring my heart to my throat. "We're here."

We're just on the corner before the bus stop, Trish had agreed to drop me off here. I exit the car with the bag of Elise's clothes, it's do or die time. The downpour has slowed, but the rain is still enough to send a shiver down my spine. I hold my breath and exhale as I step around and see her. She's wearing a denim jacket over a black and white striped dress that cuts off at her knees, making way for solid dark leggings, and pink shoes. She looks like a dream. She looks like my dream. She's holding a transparent umbrella while she waits, I wasn't smart enough to bring one.

"Elise!" I yell, grabbing her attention. I'm about 10 feet away, but I can see the look of shock on her face at hearing my voice, and the worry in her eyes seeing my face.

"I... But.. I..." She stammers, "I was expecting Rouge, why are you here?" She eventually gets out, the nerves hanging clearly in her voice.

"I came to kiss you." I reply, honestly, as I begin walking towards her.

"I... I told you... I'm straight..." She protests, unable to meet my unflinching gaze.

"Then look me in the eye and say that." I answer. She doesn't

"It was a mistake." She repeats from before.

"Then tell me to stop." I answer. She doesn't.

"I don't like girls." She states, feebly, clearly not convinced of that anymore.

"Maybe." I answer, reaching her, placing my hand against her face. "But I think you like me."

It becomes clear as her lips press into mine, as she drops her umbrella to the ground, as the rain falls onto us both of while we embrace.

She does.