You choose pleasure

You don't try to fight the pleasure you are feeling, you are embracing it. And it works! Pain didn't disappear, but it became distant, bearable. It's weird, but not entirely unpleasant, you should want to end it, but you are not. You moan. You are not sure, but you think, that Gavin looked at you with surprise. You don't care about it. You don't care about anything, you just want to drown in this painful bliss. You forgot about everything, about your ambitions, plans to leave Vuzuno, about rivalry with Gavin. The only thing that counts for you is this pleasant pain, it's overwhelming. You want to...

But then something again clicks in your mind. If you let yourself go now, if you forget yourself and give yourself fully to this weird feeling, you'll never be able to come back. You know that it will be like a ****, you will just want more and more. This is compelling vision, but are you not sure that you want to go that way. That you want do dedicate your life to feel pain. Every day every person has to make many decisions. But the one that you'll make now is potentially life-changing.