Delivering the Stool Sample

To deliver the stool sample, you’ll need to shit first. You head back to your room, picking up the container, and then walk over to the communal bathroom. Self-conscious, you look around, making sure that there’s nobody in the corridor to see you. You slowly push open the door to the bathroom, make sure that the coast is clear there too, and duck into a stall as quickly as you can.

You whip out your phone, and then look down at the container. How is this supposed to work? It takes a little bit of working out, but you eventually find a position and angle that makes things line up without being too uncomfortable, and you scroll through your feeds, willing yourself to crap. You’re not much into butt stuff, but you could imagine that if Janet were… well, that fantasy will have to wait for a couple more minutes, at a minimum.

It takes a couple of minutes for you to do your business. You tidy up quickly and efficiently after the fact, waiting tactically for a guy using a urinal to wash-up and depart before you leave your stall. From there, it takes a little while for you to get to the hospital.

You walk up to the front desk, telling them that you’re Alex Knight, looking for a nurse named Janet. The receptionist gives you a warm smile, although you can tell from the creases in his eyes that such a request is a bit unusual. He marks down something in the system anyways, though, and you wait a little longer in the main room, sitting next to an old man who seems to have a rather persistent wet cough. The bald, overweight man babbles to himself in some Eastern European tongue, and you’re more than a little tempted to move seats, before Janet bursts into the room.

“Hey Alex, how you doing!” she cries out. You follow her into the corridors of the hospital, and as soon as you’re out of sight of the other patients, she gives you a quick hug. You imagine that she probably wouldn’t want to give this same treatment to the guy who was sitting next to you. “TBH, I didn’t expect you to even show up,” she says. “I mean, my shift was nearly over, and I was texting my friends like, I don’t think he’s coming. But here you are! You got the shit?”

“Of course I got the shit. It’s good shit,” you say with a smile, patting your backpack.

“Good shit,” she says back with a smile. Her make-up, as usual, is absolutely immaculate, and you still have no clue how the scrubs fit her curves so well.

You pass her your sample, and she holds it at her side, walking purposefully to a destination unknown. You follow her around for several minutes, making light conversation about your school life, until she stops by an area that doesn’t look like it’s intended for the public to access.

“I could have let you go a couple minutes ago and explained everything out there,” she says, “but I figured I’d take you on a little tour, keep you around for a little longer.”

She gives you a warm smile, which you gladly return. A doubt nags at you, though—aren’t nurses supposed to be really busy? How does she have time for this?

“Anyways,” she continues, “we don’t actually do the lab tests here in the hospital; we send it off somewhere and I just need to fill out some paperwork here. But like, you wouldn’t get the results immediately anyways, so you’re not really waiting that much longer anyways.” She sounds like she’s apologising for something, when it’s really no big deal. You’re probably fine, right? “Point is, come back next Thursday? We’ll have the results then, and hopefully everything will be fine then…”

“But then I’ll never get to see you again,” you say, with a mock frown.

“Make sure to break a leg then,” she laughs, and you nod, solemnly promising to do so.

It takes her only a bit to fill out the rest of the paperwork, and you hug her goodbye, promising to return in a week. You have a ‘date’ to keep now, and you practically run back to the dorm, so that you can prepare everything for the occasion.

Janet +10