Presses Them For More Information

While the cultists tie Steve to a nearby tree, he continues his inquiry.

"Okay, so the latex was a mistake, but why make any of those things at all?" The leader groans in irritation.

"I thought you had only a single question, not a barrage of them."

"Well, I'm curious."

"Ugh. Fine. Our order has existed for thousands of years, its teachings passed on from generation to generation, all in anticipation of freeing the great Indalus, a deity of bestial nature. When man became civilized, he tried to show them the glory of all that they had abandoned, and for that, they banished him for an eternity. Now, on the dawn of the moment when all the planets shall align-"

"Hold on a second. Aligned planets? Isn't that a bit cliched? Why isn't it... I don't know, the day that they make a right angle with the sun or something? You know, something original."

"Look, it just isn't, okay?" The man cringes and rubs his brow for a moment. "It's not something that we can just do. Magic is a very finicky thing and can be offset by even the slightest of errors. Cliched or not, it is the planetary alignment on which we should act."

"But it isn't the planetary alignment anyways."

"What?"

Steve shakes his head. "The planets aren't aligned, not even close. Line-ups are really rare and there aren't any coming anytime soon."

"Oh, I... but that doesn't..." The man reached into a pocket that had previously been concealed by his cloak, pulling out a PDA. He pushes its screen, mumbling with concern, and then hits his palm to his forehead. "Agh! It was the YEAR 200861, not the day 2008, 6, 1! Stupid, stupid, stupid! All that time and money, just straight down the drain!" He takes a second to regain his composure, then stands tall and confident as ever. "No matter, we'll just have to deal with this as best we can.