Turn to face the speaker

You whirl around, and your jaw promptly drops. Standing before you is an enormous woman; slender as a whip and as beautiful as...

Your brain fails you. You literally cannot think of anything as beautiful as the woman; no, the goddess standing before you. A turquoise, shimmering sheet of fabric comes down over one shoulder, swaying gracefully around her and accentuating her form. One of her perfect breasts lies uncovered, her unblemished ivory skin smooth and glowing.

It isn't until a melodious laugh leaves her lips that you realize you've been staring slack-jawed at her, arms hanging limply beside you. You shake your head and avert your eyes, almost throwing yourself at the floor in your speed to kneel.

"Now now, that's hardly necessary, young John. Rise." You do so, a bit sheepishly. She laughs again. Allow me to introduce myself, I am Aphrodite, goddess of love. And I have brought you here to-" She abruptly pauses, a look of confused mirth on her face.

"Well, that certainly is a pleasant view." You follow her gaze, with mounting horror, to your crotch. Still slathered in olive oil from your pre-**** self-indulgement.