Lady in Mating

Lady Charlotte FitzStuart was not amused. The previous day, not only had she had the indignity of sharing a room with the King’s personal servant, albeit with an effective dividing screen, but then she had to walk the length of the North Wing of Cockshoots Hall just to bathe, as a quick use of the basin in the room allocated for Royal servants like her was hardly an adequate preparation for the day. Then to make things worse, she could hear sniggering as she undressed almost as if people where watching her nakedness. As a Lady in Waiting and daughter of one of those earls descended from Charles II’s illegitimate offspring, she had never been so ashamed. At least this morning, Queen Mary had offered her the use of the bathroom in the Royal Suite next door so after ensuring Her Majesty was ready for the day and having seen the monarch depart, she filled the bath and stripped.

George V adored shooting and was currently on a tour of Great Houses in competition with one of his friends to see who could shoot the most pheasants in a week. In addition he was very concerned about what he perceived to be post-war anti-monarchist sentiment and wanted to get the views of the Earl of High Wycombe, who was in touch with modern thinking, on the subject, so he was killing much more than two birds with one stone. In fact he had just returned from the Earl’s Suite which he left seconds after his wife entered the Countess’s Suite for a natter, so when he entered the bathroom he was expecting to see his wife.

Lady FitzStuart tried to in vain to cover herself with hands, but she had been generously blessed by nature and 2 hands were not enough to protect her modesty. Her mind flashed back to her ancestor, but this was good old stamp-collecting George V not super randy Charles II, and then her eyes fixed on his groin.

The King stared and stirred. Of course he had seen naked and semi-naked women other than the Queen many times before on visits to the Empire, but that felt educational and they were all unashamed. The Lady in Waiting’s hands were drawing more attention to her assets then he could stand. All he could do was issue an order “Lady FitzStuart. I insist you continue with your bath. Take as much time as you need, I shall return later.” Obviously, being the King, he could not apologise and abruptly turned and left.

Major Seymour Dashwood, the King’s Equerry, was less perturbed about sharing a room. Many years spent in India and then at the Front had rendered him unshockable. Besides, like Charlotte, he was relatively junior in his role, so he was honoured to be there. He was fully dressed and ready to work but surprised that the King had not yet called for his assistance that morning, especially as breakfast was imminent. Then the King’s summoning bell started to ring quite vigorously.

“You rang, Your Majesty” Seymour opened in response.
“There appears to be a strange … well not strange, in fact I know her quite well … in my bathroom.”
The equerry waited but when they was no response “And what would you like me to do about it, Your Majesty?”.