Monica tells them

Phoebe speaks first, “We have sex all the time, and I’m sure you’re tired of Joey talking about it.” She looks at me and Monica. “But I am curious about your sex life.”

Monica answers, “I’ll be the first to admit: our sex life could be better. It’s been about a month. I’ve been a terrible wife. But this week I’ve been feeling really horny. I’ve been reading this really steamy book, and it’s really gotten me worked up. I was planning on jumping Chandler’s bone tonight.” She giggles a little bit, obviously feeling the effects of the ****.

Joey asks, “What was your plan?”

Monica sips her drink, and says, “Well I packed some skimpy lingerie that I planned on putting on while Chandler brushed his teeth while getting ready for bed.”

“Oh my god! You brought lingerie! Me too!” Rachel excitedly screams. “What color did you bring?”

My wife laughs, excited that she wasn’t the only one. “It’s this red lace babydoll dress. What about you? I’m so glad I’m not the only one.”

Rachel replies, “Mine is black. I like the way it contrast with my ivory skin. What about you Phoebe? Did you bring any?”

“It’s such a waste of time for me to put on lingerie. Joey rips them off me too quickly.” Phoebe says.

“Sorry I can’t wait to put it in my beautiful wife,” Joey says. Then he looks at Monica, “But I do like the thought of Monica wearing some lingerie underneath that hoodie. Anything else special you have planned for tonight?”

Her face blushes a bit, and she replies, “I haven’t really done it since we first started dating, but I’m really in the mood to suck his dick.”

Ross cheers, “Sounds like you’re in for a good time tonight.” He reaches around the fire to high five me.

Rachel asks, “Why don’t you do it more? Ross loves blowjobs. It’s the cheapest birthday present, and Father’s Day gift there is.”

“My neck and jaw always get really tired and sore,” Monica says.

“Don’t worry. I have some techniques I can show you that will help with that,” says Phoebe. She nudges me in the arm. “And I didn’t know you were packing a jaw breaker down there. You’ll have to show me sometime.”

Monica laughs drunkenly, “Oh my god. Did you pick up on my husband’s penis size from that one comment?”

Phoebe says, “That and I like to look at his bulge. His adjustments aren’t very subtle.”

Rachel burst out laughing, “Thank god I wasn’t the only one! I felt so guilty checking him out. So hard not to look when he’s grabbing it and moving it around.”

I sit there a little bit embarrassed. I’m trying to remember adjusting my penis while we’ve been sitting here. Maybe I do it subconsciously. But I gain a little confidence boost knowing that two hot women had been checking me out.

“You girls have been checking out my husband!?” Monica feints shock.

“Oh shush. You flirt with Joey all the time.” Phoebe says. “Let’s just admit that we all have attractive spouses that we all have checked out.”

Ross says, “I admit I checked out Phoebe cleavage earlier when she bent over to toss a log into the fire. And I checked out Monica’s ass when we walked out here.”

Joey adds, “And Rachel with that shirt, it’s impossible not to stare at your boobs. Seriously I can’t look at anything else. Monica purposefully wore a hoodie so I couldn’t check her out.”

Rachel leans forward squeezing her cleavage together, and asks me, “What about you Chandler? Will you admit that you’ve been checking me out?”