Nothing, as your Mom walks in

You stand aghast, staring at the mess on the wall that had until a few moments ago been your sister Zoe.

"Hi honey, what's up?"

Asked later, you would swear that you leapt three feet in the air, twisting 180 degrees around at the sound of the unexpected voice. As it is, you merely start and then turn to see your mother standing behind you.

She's obviously been outside, reading and sunning herself, as she holds a paperback and wears as close to nothing as you had ever seen her in.

"Gahhhhhh...." is all you manage to say.

She grins and pulls the string of her tiny bikini panties away and then lets it snap back against her (astonishingly) firm and (deliciously) tan hip. She gives a little twirl to show you exactly how much of her fantastically fit body isn't covered by her current outfit.

"Like it?" she asks brightly.

Your mental gears grind to a halt.

Then her expression changes as she notices what's left of her daughter. "Ew...what happened here?"

You fail to respond.

She shrugs and reaches for a paper towel. "Well, I suppose I better clean it up."

You panic.

Without thinking, you raise the calculator toward her and push a button.

Your mother disappears with a quiet pop, and a paperback, a tiny bikini, and a small white egg drop toward the kitchen floor.