Man's up

Randy got out of bed. He pulled a pair of jeans over his boxers. He was already wearing a t-shirt and he strode out into the hall and went next door. He knocked loudly. He had never complained before, despite this happening at least twice a week.

The blonde opened the door. "Yeah?"

"Can you turn that down?"

"Why should I?" she asked. She put a hand on her hip and cocked herself to the side. She wore a white leather mini-skirt and pink halter top.

"Because this crappy techno music is bad for you!" said Randy. He was being facetious, but the blonde stared for a moment.

"Is that really so? I've been listening to this for years!"

The brunette came to the door to see what the matter was. She wore a pair of tight black leather pants and a leather vest. "What's up, Lori? Who's he?"

"He's the guy next door, Cheryl," said the blonde. "He just pointed out that listening to techno is bad for us. Go turn it off."

"Seriously?" asked Cheryl.

"Yes, it will make your hair fall out and thighs balloon up," said Randy.

"Oh my god!" said Cheryl. She ran over to the where her phone was plugged into a base connected to two small white speakers. She shut the music off.

"Thank you so much for telling us!" said Lori.

Are they really believing anything I say? thought Randy. He decided for a test. "You better check if an damage was done already."

"How do we do that?" asked Lori, checking out her thighs.

"It's a simple medical test. Doctors do it all of the time. It's perfectly normal."

"What is it?" asked Cheryl.

"Twice a day for the next month, you need to closely inspect each other's rectums. Look really close and see if you can see any blue and yellow bumps. Look very, very closely as the bumps can be very small. Then stick you finger up your roommate's rectum good and deep and make sure it's not cold. If either of those things happen, go see a doctor immediately."

"I guess we can do that," said Lori. "Thanks so much. What's your name?"

"Randy, you can thank me the way neighbors usually do."

"How's that?" asked Lori.