Is that a penis ring in your window display?

John looked sternly at the young proprietress. "Is that a penis ring in your window display?"

"Do you want it to be?"

"Don't pussyfoot with me. Is that a penis ring on public display where children passing by will see it?"

"It is a fine leather ring, lovingly formed and carefully made; make of it what you will. I am certain some would happily make use of it as man's best friend."

"I would never consider using something that revolting!"

"Then why are you here? You would not have noticed the ring if it didn't call to you."

The man's face turned deep red.

"Don't fret, John; we do not morally censure here, and the only memory I retain of your custom is sufficient to greet you when you return. Your secret will be safe, and as discreet as you allow it to be."

"I'll take it," he sighed.

"I'm sure you will be satisfied. You understand that is an antique and that it comes with a provenance. That means it has been used before, although it has been thoroughly cleaned and cared for, and maintained in pristine condition."

"Yeah, I get it. How much?"

She named a figure, he paid in cash, and the friendly woman showed him how to put it on, evincing no embarrassment regarding his deepest privacy. Once fully instructed, he put it in the small pouch that came with it and walked out.

"Remember to treat it well," whispered Ann as the door closed behind him.