Drinking with my friends’ wives

The women sit together on the bed. Phoebe, unfortunately, is no longer naked. She wears one of her husband’s extra large shirts. Rachel sits in her green panties, her long legs stretched out. A black large-cupped bra rests on the floor. I immediately notice the press of Rachel’s nipples against her shirt.

“You didn’t bring cups?” Phoebe says.

“Oh fuck, sorry. I got distracted,” I say. I turn to leave, but Rachel grabs the bottle from my hand.

“Screw it,” the pretty blonde brings the bottle right to her lips and gulps a shot. She grimaces at the taste but doesn’t complain. She’s wipes off her lip and hands the bottle to Phoebe.

Phoebe says, “I’m sorry about tonight. I was just joking about the dick measuring contest. I was shocked everyone went along. Usually you guys ignore my sexual jokes.”

“It’s not your fault. This isn’t the first time Ross has gotten jealous when he’s drunk. I had to end all my friendships with guys very early in our relationship.”

“And I should’ve chosen Chandler,” Phoebe adds. “It would have been impossible for you not to be vocal while riding that dick.”

Rachel cracks her first smile since entering the house.

I take a sip from the bottle. “I have the same sized dick as both your husbands.”

“Oh shut up with the false modesty,” Phoebe says. “You have the girthest penis I’ve ever seen.”

“Seriously,” Rachel says. “It’s definitely not the same size as my husband’s. And yes, it was impossible to keep my mouth shut. I was hoping you were keeping Phoebe distracted so he wouldn’t notice. Why didn’t you offer him anal? Don’t you do that sort of thing.”

Phoebe laughs, “I have. I don’t do it all the time. I have to be in the right mood.”

Jokingly I ask, “Are you in the mood tonight?”

“I’ll never be in the mood to have that thick of a dick in my ass,” Phoebe says.

“My wife has taken in a couple times,” I say.

Phoebe laughs again, “Well your wife is a much bigger woman than me.”

“Is your wife still with Joey,” Rachel asks.

“Yeah. They were still hooking up when I went outside,” I answer.

“How do you feel about that?”

“I’m glad she’s having fun,” I say. “She deserves a night off.” I don’t linger on the thought of what she’s doing with Joey. I can’t judge when I’m in bed with my friends’ wives.

“Thank god I didn’t end up with Joey,” Rachel says, forgetting his wife is next to her. When she sees Phoebe, she adds, “No offense. We just don’t get along.”

“None taken. He can be an acquired taste,” Phoebe says. “Luckily Monica doesn’t put up with any of his shit. I can’t believe he went down on her so quickly. He hasn’t done that to me in years.”

Phoebe’s eyes linger on me after her statement. I take a drink of the bottle. I pass it to Rachel. She nudges me.

“What?” I ask.

She pulls me close to her, and whispers in my ear, “Take the hint: offer to go down on her.”

“But you’re right here,” I object.

Rachel rolls her eyes. She turns to Phoebe, “Chandler is shy. He just said that he wanted to go down on you, but is afraid of being rejected. Would you reject this man’s tongue between your legs?”

Phoebe smiles, “Never. All he has to do is ask.”

She stares me down, daring me to ask.