Cover the bush but leave the rosebud exposed

After a moment of deliberation your male mind makes the choice, finding it a little more arousing to show off your underboob and give any observant guys a free pass to seeing your butthole. You always did have something of an ass/anal fetish in your porn collecting.

As if to wave the flag at any guy observant enough to notice, you put the nearly empty oil bottle against your rectum and press just a little before clutching the bottle with both hands and squeezing. Oil jets out, coating your insides before the bottle runs dry. Just to be sure - you tell yourself - you pushing the bottle against your back hole a couple more times, feeling your arousal come back up to boiling before you **** yourself to drop the bottle on the side table.

"Gorgeous," you gasp, looking down at yourself. You look like you've come from an oil-wrestling contest and stand on legs made unsteady by your arousal.

You make your way around the house and to the driveway, trying to remember which way to go.