Chuck, a Marvel movie buff

I'd always been a superhero nerd, leaning more toward Marvel than DC for two reasons; their focus on ground-level human relationships rather than grand, philosophical archetypes, and the babes. Wonder Woman was well and good, and any red-blooded American man would pop a chub for Power Girl, but they couldn't hold a candle to Black Widow, Ms. Marvel, or She-Hulk. When Disney bought them out, I was worried that they might de-sex it all, but then I saw Scarlett fucking Johansson in Iron Man 2 and my fate was sealed. Over the next ten years, I cranked out more loads to the MCU than audiences cranked out billions.

That changed when I was diagnosed as an EDP; instead of jerking off to my favorite Marvel bombshells, I started dressing my female friends and family in costumes and fucking them. It was kind of fun, figuring out who played which roles best -- one neighbor girl turned out to be the spitting image of Zoe Saldana once we painted her green -- but something deep in my balls always wished for more.

When the lady from the Take-A-Bitch Foundation came around, I knew exactly what -- that is, who -- I wanted.