Beauty is putting some disreputable girls in their place...

You aren't quite sure what kind of scene of idiocy and/or depravity you should be bracing yourself for - whether or not your shapeshifting charge is involved, but especially if she is. It wasn't just a matter of the criminals in this city being perverted from top to bottom - even aside from that, they were just downright eccentric and always knew how to throw a nasty surprise at you. That's what you'd been taught from Molly's stories from when she regularly crusaded as the original Nightingale. Aside from the Full House Gang and the vile Gloomy Sunday and Baconator, there were quite a few small-time hoodlums and creeps that you'd taken down in your brief crimefighting career, and half the time you walked away from the fray with a vexed, "never thought I'd see THAT" kind of feeling. On one occasion, namely your encounter with the animate mass of spiced pastry dough calling the "Ginger-Dead-man", your astonishment had almost gotten you really hurt, as it took you a bit too long to react when the little freak pulled out an uzi machine-pistol.

Wait... why are baked goods on your mind? You sniff a couple of times. A curl of wood-smoke drifts through one of the park's hedges. Following the smell and pushing some of the leaves and branches aside, you hear Beast-Beauty's voice, talking loudly as if to a crowd. "Alright kiddos, now to show you a REAL treat. This is the most fun thing to do with one of these. First you give it a lick. Then, you put the head in your mouth..."

You hear a chorus of gasps of surprise... high-pitched gasps. Young voices. Oh no, you think - please, don't let me get caught up in another horrifying spandex-scandal (or 'scandal-ex' as the tabloids sometimes called it) while I'm still trying to get out from under the last one... Eschewing subtlety, you leap forward through the greenery and do a nimble diving roll, coming up standing right next to Beast-Beauty, who whirls to look at you in surprise... standing in front of what seems to be a crowd of grade school students on a field trip, including their teacher.

Right next to Beast-Beauty is an extremely out-of-place-looking dutch oven made out of wrought iron - the sort of gothic-industrial aesthetic that La Petite Morte favored, which meant that it was likely another item constructed with her shrinking tech and ready to be deployed on command. The usual ensemble of Beast-Beauty, her sleeveless, cleavage-baring tight-fitting bodysuit, was made slightly more modest by the addition of a giraffe-spotted apron, and a pair of cow-themed oven mitt on her left hand. In her right hand was what appeared to be a freshly-baked animal cracker in the shape of a lion, poised right in front of her open mouth.

"Oh, hey there new girl!" She said, placing the treat down on a small tray with some cookie cutters and several racks of the animal-shaped cookies cooling. "Didn't seem like much was happening with the speech thing so Mrs. Mackie here asked me if I had time to give the class a little presentation about outdoor fire safety and avoiding poison ivy and such. And I decided, why not do the fun part first before talking about putting out the embers correctly and stuff?"

Even though this heroine had been shirking responsibilities you suddenly felt a bit embarrassed about having assumed... whatever you'd assumed about her. You really were holding her part in all this against her too much, weren't you? Sure, maybe she'd failed to aid you when you were captured by an evil poker-themed matriarch who planned to sell you into sexual servitude, and she'd been rather negligent in regards to the whole Baconator disaster, but you'd done something mean back to her already (offering her 'company' to an incredibly creepy pervert whom you'd encountered at the studio), and she hadn't complained about it.

You give Beastie a weak smile, and she gives you a sly but well-meaning glance back. "Oh crud, are they looking for me? Can I get like, five more minutes? I hate to ask but could you stall for me?"

Eccentric though she may be (you still had no idea what was going through her head when she abandoned you at the Full House's lair), you decidedto give her a fresh start in your mind. Her appellation really was well earned... She had a sort of sprightly, radiant appearance to her that could easily land her on a magazine cover. Her silky black hair was short and had a teased-up fringe along the front. Where her skin showed through the cutouts, it was the light tan of a person of mixed race - assuming she was even fully human, what with the pointed, swept-back ears, prominent canine teeth, and slitted irises. She has an easygoing charm that she displays while spending the next few minutes demonstrating the proper method to douse the tiny cooking fire she'd lit and spread the ashes around. With a flash, she momentarily shapeshifted into a large dog to kick dirt on the patch of dirt and ash, making the kids cheer and applaud. It was an odd thing to do, definitely... but it was innocent and even a bit kindhearted, and besides, she hadn't gone out of earshot of the political rally so it was only a minor dereliction of duty, if that...

Just as you were resolving to try and make friends with someone who was (and likely would be again) on the League's A-list, you heard the distinctive muffled squeaking of a gagged woman trying to say something. Before you can react, Beast-Beauty (who also seems to notice it) perks up, back in her humanoid form, and skips over to a nearby tree, climbing into the branches and disappearing among the leaves in a flash. A few seconds later, the heroine descends with a couple of women dressed in very provocative clothing - one with a neon-pink wig wearing a pleather tank top, short-shorts, and thigh-high stiletto boots, the other with platinum blonde pigtails, excessive eyeshadow, and a skimpy 'catholic schoolgirl' outfit with a plaid skirt and stockings. Both women were bound, gagged, and looking rather terrified.

"Now!" Beast-Beauty says before you or the schoolteacher can get over your shock, "Another important thing to remember is always being on the lookout for bad people. Boys, when you get older, you gotta always be on your guard for unscrupulous women like this!"

"Why? What'd they do? Why are they dressed so funny?" A few curious voices ask. Your eyes go wide and you start furiously shaking your head and mouthing the word 'no'. But somehow, not being in your costume makes you feel less confident, less capable to assert yourself and take control of the situation. And so, Beast-Beauty continues her presentation.

"I'm glad you asked! You know how you kiddos always have to do your homework and clean your rooms? It's your social responsibility. I mean, sometimes it takes you awhile to get the rhythm of it, but you always need to try. But I think all of you would agree that if one of your classmates told his or her guardians 'I won't do those things unless you pay me to', it would make them a spoiled, greedy brat, right? Well, there are some women out there who will try and extort money out of men for doing things that every woman is supposed to do for her guy. Or just, y'know, any guy who's around who needs it. Somewhere along the line, you see, a lot of girls started forgetting their place in the natural order, which is to serve the dominant male, and -"

Beast-Beauty keeps trying to talk but no more sound is coming out of her mouth as the class stares on in fascination/shock. Failing that, she starts pantomiming something obscene-looking with her fingers, but mercifully fails to get the message across. Finally their teacher regains her senses. "Field trip over, it's almost one o'clock, children! Come on, get back to the bus, go, go, go! And cover your ears!" the schoolteacher, who looks like she's aged 10 years in the last 2 minutes, shouts, hustling the disappointed schoolchildren away.

Turning to look at you with a little pout on her face, Beast-Beauty finally realizes that you are the one who was using powers to silence her. You drop your concentration on it as you pull a knife from your belt and cut the bonds of the two tied-up women, allowing them to run off.

"I don't think that was such a great idea, ma'am." you say to her through gritted teeth, your green eyes flashing angry disbelief at her.

"Hey! Why're you letting those bad girls go?" Beauty asks in a huff.

"Nevermind the fact that the League of Propriety isn't even supposed to enforce THAT kind of law - what makes you even think they were guilty of anything in the first place?"

"They were hangin' around the buses where those local politicians and operatives were unloading for their event!"

Finding that a bit harder to retort without sounding Pollyannaish than you expected, you throw your head back and give an angry groan. "And what was with all that 'serving the dominant male' stuff? What century are you from?"

"3rd B.C.E. And, um, this one for the past 20 years and change." Beast-Beauty says nonchalantly, blinking as if she doesn't understand the thrust of your question.

Once again, she's left you in a position where you don't have a good reply. "Oh. Well... you speak very good modern English, I guess."

Beauty beams and loudly purrs(?!) like a cat, her irritation with you seemingly forgotten. "Thank you! Oh hey, I meant to ask you - since you rocked that two-piece thing the Streaker came up with for you, I was wonderin' if you want to partner up with me? I promise I'll help you come up with a new bird-themed costume and name. Oh, there are so many good ones to choose from! How do you feel about a maid outfit with peacock feather highlights?"

"That doesn't really go with my powers th-" you catch yourself before you tacitly agree to anything this crazed shapeshifter suggests. "I mean... can we table that discussion for now and just... get back to the event? If nothing else we need to be sure we're seen there as the crowd is leaving, that's the likeliest time for trouble to start. And the other two guards are getting antsy." you say, exasperated.

"Oh, okay! Yeah, I'll need to fill you and the other girl in on the specifics of our upcoming Semi-Monthly Police Outreach League Tour. I know what you're thinking, and don't worry - we won't have to escort them all the way to the League of Propriety headquarters and back. It's just a euphemism, heheh."

As you walk with Beauty back to the event, where the promise of the council candidate to 'Clean up this town and restore a safe, family-friendly Acropolis City' brings a round of applause, you strain your super-hearing to the limit, doing your best to pick up something, anything... any kind of crime or disaster that would give you an excuse to interrupt whatever this 'heroine' had planned for you and poor Jane and actually do some heroism. But even so... would that necessarily make what followed less likely to be perverse?