Barb the Barbarian

"What the hell do you mean there's no room for me?!" Barbara demanded as she stared down the nerdy woman in front of her.

"Look, Barb." Clara said, trying to calm the taller woman down. "I mean no disrespect, but our LARPing party is already full. I'm the Druid, Amber's the Assassin, Rachel's the Archer, Yuki's the Bard, Xena's the Cleric, Samantha's our Evil Queen, and Ashley is the Barbarian. I know you wanted to try LARPing, but -"

"Well, then add another party member!" Barb spat.

"I can't just add another party member!" Clara replied, "We've been working on this for months! I can't just add a new character! If I did, I'd have to write a new script, I'd have to make new costumes, I'd have -"

"It sounds like you're just making excuses now!" Barb groaned, rolling her eyes.

"Excuse me, Clara?" Yuki said as she poked her head in, interrupting the two and getting their attention. "Ashley just called and they said they can't make it tomorrow. Paula is getting a divorce from Wendy, and -"

"I'll fill in!" Barb shouted, slamming a fist on the table before turning to Clara. "Now you don't have an excuse for me not to join your game!"

"Uh, that's not a good idea..." Clara began cautiously. "See, Ashley's role was chosen because -"

"Oh, please! I can play any part this Ashley woman can!"

"No, see, that's the thing. Ashley's a -"

"I mean, how hard can it be?!" Barb asked with a mocking laugh, looking around at all the other LARPers in the room. "All you do is dress up in lame costumes and pretend to fight dragons and monsters. Any loser could do that!"

Clara, Yuki, Rachel, Samantha, Amber, and Xena scowled at Barb before turning to each other, the six thinking the exact same thing.

"Okay, Barb." Clara said, annoyance in her voice. "You wanna fill in for Ashley and wear their costume? Congrats. You're in."

"Yes!"

"You want me to LARP in this?!" Barb demanded as she stood in the middle of the wooded area the group had scouted the next moring, wearing only a leather belt, loincloth, and brown boots. In her hands was a fake battle axe.

"Is this Ashley woman some kind of nudist or something?!" Barb asked as she gestured down to what she was wearing, comparing it to the more conservative costumes of the other LARPers. "I'm practically naked here! Even the evil bitch we're fighting is more dressed than I am!"

"Well, first off," Clara said, "Ashley isn't a woman. Ashley's a man. You know, like Ashley Williams?"

"Why didn't you tell me that?!"

"Why didn't you let us?" Clara challenged.

"Why didn't you ask?" Xena asked curiously.

"Look, we're losing daylight here!" Clara said. "Let's just get to our places, okay?"

"Fine! Fine." Barb said in annoyance as she walked off...

Exposing her bare ass to the other women.

"So, are you going to tell her that Ashley's costume had more to it than the that?" Yuki asked with a giggle once Barb was out of earshot.

"I will." Clara replied with a smirk, "After our campaign."