Announcer gives an overview of the scoring & divisions

"Welcome to the Large Elegant Curvy Glamour Goddesses' Fun Games"
says the pretty slim blonde announcer woman with a BIG welcoming smile.

"The rules for LECGGFG are as follows:

Each team has FIVE big, beautiful women and TWENTY tiny, puny, worthless men, FIVE for EACH round. All the men have to weigh at least 200 lbs LESS than the average for the women ...

There are three teams. Each man must choose one of the opposing teams to go up against in one of the games, which one is decided by a lottery.

In Round One, entitled "One on One", the scoring is as follows:
The MEN get one point for every five seconds they last in the sumo match,
plus 10 points if they win, which is unlikely,
plus one point per splash "taken like a man",
but minus 20 points if there are any infringements,
minus 50 if there are any violent infringements by the man.

In Round One, the woman scores 100 points for winning the sumo match,
minus one point for every 5 seconds the man lasts,
a 20 point bonus is available if the woman wins while landing on the man,
then in each of three splashes, the woman gets up to 10 points each for looks and for style, grace & control, making a total of 120 available in the splashes alone.
The ladies can also win 2 point bonuses for splashes off the top rope on the 2nd & 3rd jump, and a 10 point bonus if she kicks the male in the groin by surprise during the sumo match, and 20 points for making him submit right after it, minus one per minute it takes to achieve this.

Round Two is entitled "Kiss This"
Here, the men score 2 points per flat handed slap to the face "taken like a man",
minus 20 points per violation e.g. a flinch,
then they score 1 point per face-strapped-to-ass take-down "taken like a man",
and minus five points per not so convincing one.

Meanwhile, the ladies can collect MANY MORE POINTS for their team by scoring:
2 points per really hard slap given up to 10, 20 pts per felling of a man with a slap,
a 10 pt bonus for taking the man by surprise with a knee to the groin during slappings, then there are again up to 10 points each for looks and for style, grace & control in FIVE face-strapped-to-ass land-on-his-face jump-drops, making a total of 200 available in these alone. The ladies can also win 2 point bonuses for splashes off the top rope on the 2nd & 3rd jump, and a 10 point bonus if she kicks the male in the groin by surprise while getting up from a face-drop.
Then, she gets up to 10 style points each for of three big smooches she makes him give her in the time between face-drops, + 100 points minus one point per minute off 25 minutes that she sits still full-weight on his face after the face-drops.

Round three is entitled "Human Carpet"
Here, the men score 3 points per clinched fist punch taken "like a man", up to ten times, plus a 10 point bonus if he is still on his feet until the 10th one, and 4 points for the 8th one. There is also a five point bonus for taking the treadings like a man, and minus 40 per infringement if he doesn't.

The ladies are in their two's - one holds the man, while the other punches him, switching over every three punches - They get 100 pts for each time they fell the man through a clinched fist punch to the face, 20 points each time thy hit him in the face but do not fell him, and a 200 pt bonus if he is unable to get up to receive the 10th punch, and so he must "take it" in a lying down position.
There is a 5pt bonus per tooth knocked out, 2 per male stagger, 10 for swelling around the eye, 40 if he falls to his knees and pleads, and 150 per knockout (the male must be reawoken with a slap each time). The women get up to 10 points each for looks and for style, grace & control, during the punching, and the same again during the treading, making a total of 80 available in the these alone.
The ladies can also win 2 point bonuses for splashes off the top rope on the 2nd & 3rd jump, 20 pts if the makle is left "unable to get up anymore", 30 if this last for over 20 minutes, and a 10 point bonus if she kicks the male in the groin by surprise during the sumo match.

Then, during the treading, there are 10 pt bonuses for standing with both feet on his chest, for popping a ball with a stomp, for a on-the-face and on-the-ball pose & tread by both ladies at the same time & 10 pts if a cracking sound is heard in the rib area, and 15 points if he is left lying there at the end of it all facing up, bewildered, and with a freshly-worn dirty tampon in his mouth.

Then in the final round of the evening "insertion"
the males get 5 pts per groin kick "taken like a man", and 2 compliance points for all the rest;
and the big, beautiful women get points out of 40 eleven times (once for the ball kicking, and one for each male-strapped-upside-down-to their back and butts sit-down, plus 100 points minus one per minute off 25 she sits on his face for between the 8th & 9th sit-down." There are ALSO ten point bonuses available for a tap out, a brown streak on his nose, 15 if all over his face, and 10 for a "brown smell".

The announcer pauses for breath and effect.

"And as you know, this is only one of TWELVE such events going on simultaneously:
In Division A: between Japan, Samoa & Texas;
in division B: between Alabama, Australia & Connecticut;
in div C, between Hawaii, England and South Africa;
in div D: between Tonga, Ireland and Ohio;
in Europe A: Germany, Russia & Ireland;
in Africa A: between Ghana, Egypt & Mozambique;
in Americas A: Alaska, Columbia & New York State;
in Afr/Oz: between Iran, Malaysia & South Korea;
and so on forth in the continent B events too.

The winner of each event moves up a division for next month's clashes, making for two level D semi-finals events AND the overall winner's regions play one another; the loser of each clash moves down a rung so that,
then, in the month thereafter, 1 team from above + 2 from below go into each division again, A to D and continental A & B.

.... Now ARRRRRRRRRRRRE YOU READY FOR SOME MAN-BUSTING ACTIOOOOON?"