"Advertising"

I know that the only way to get a date for the prom is to "advertise" myself: good dancer, nice personality, money to spend ... big dick, just in case the night goes long.

But how do I do that? It's not like I can buy a couple of inches in the local paper.

Then I remember: my sister has a big mouth, and I know something about which she would prefer our father did not hear.