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Chapter 9 by FredWeasleyLives1 FredWeasleyLives1

Can I make it through Kat's funeral?

Rain, rain, go away. WAH!

I am chasing down a hooded figure dressed all in black. The figure is wearing a black cape with gold trim. I want so bad to catch to this mysterious figure because I know that it is Kat's killer. I want justice for Kat. No, I want for myself. I cannot deny it. The thought of has monopolized my life lately. I am so mad that I cannot think straight sometimes. I am feeling a stitch in my side from all the running I am doing, but I don't care. I will chase the figure to the ends of the Earth if I have to. Finally, the mystery villain has to stop because of a giant black cliff face. I think that my fight is finally going to be over when the villain draws a red light saber.

"You will never defeat me!" the figure cackles in a robotic voice.

"YOU KILLED KAT!" I scream in rage while drawing a yellow light saber.

I engage in the fight of my life as our weapons clash with small flashes of light. The monster is able to match me move for move. Just when it seems that I am about to get the upper hand in the fight, the evil one quickly moves its hand at me which makes me fall down hard to the ground. As soon as I get up, I get choked by an invisible . I see spots in front of my face as I concentrate all of my mental powers on the offending hand and knock it aside.

"Enough tricks!" I demand while charging my foe. "We end this now!"

I charge the jerk in a blind rage. A few more saber clashes ensue and then I find an opening. I use the opportunity to elbow the creep in the stomach which enables me to end the wretch's existence forever. I bend over and pull off the victim's mask and discover that my face is behind the mask. I quickly jolt up in bed with a frightened gasp to discover that the fight is all a dream. What does it all mean?

I look at my digital alarm clock and I discover that I still have two more hours until my ride comes to take me to a place where I know that I will cry my eyes out. I know my emotions are too amped up to get back to sleep. I know that I might as well start getting ready so I take off my white negligee and hop in the shower. I think about Kat while washing myself which causes a couple of tears to fall down my face.

I think one of the things that hurts me the most about my best friend's is that I will never know if we would have gotten together. I know Kat turned me down, but there was a time when I was fighting to stop Vincent's schemes when Kat and I shared a very romantic kiss. One minute it seemed like we were going to be girlfriends and then she dumped me. That was why I got so upset and imitated Forrest Gump's running scene because of my friends refusal. I was so confused and hurt.

Thinking about that time of my life caused a fantasy to appear in my brain. I picture Kat and I passionately kissing in her apartment like we couldn't get enough of each other. I drop my wash rag and start rubbing my breasts as I imagine myself taking off all of Kat's clothes. I get extremely wet as I see in my mind her undressing me. We fall down on her bed and rub each others' breasts which causes me to start rubbing my pussy in real life. I get so hot as I imagine my sweetie eating me out. I get so hot that I slide down the shower wall while masturbating furiously and moaning my darling's name. I cum when I start fantasizing about Kat and I scissoring each other.

I know that is never going to happen now so I know that I might as well finish washing up. I get done in a hurry and turn off the water. I put on deodorant and the clothes Louise loaned me. I see from my clock that I have 45 minutes to get ready so I round up my portable stereo and the proper CD. I play through once to make sure that the everything works fine including the microphone. I also practice the song a couple of times. I am just glad that this stereo is waterproof or I might get electrocuted later. I make sure that I have plenty of pink handkerchiefs with me because I am already getting stressed out and I haven't even left the house yet.

I wait the last few minutes in a red recliner until the doorbell rings. I gather up my stereo and open the door to find Tristan dressed as shabbily as he always is. Sometimes I think of him as a hobo even though I know he is wealthy. I think about giving him a piece of my mind, but I hold my tongue. That does not stop me from giving my friend a bit of an angry look. I am sure that he got my message since he is taken aback at first.

"How are you, Connie?" Tristan wonders while hugging me. At first I don't want to hug him because of the way that he is dressed, but I know that I am going to need all of the hugs I can get today if I am going to keep what's left of my sanity intact.

"Take a wild guess!" I snap.

"I... uh..." Tristan babbles like an idiot.

"I am sorry for being so flippant with you, but I am getting tired of people asking me that question when they ought to know how I'm feeling," I try to explain.

"It's okay," my male friend accepts while patting my left shoulder. "You look nice by the way."

"Thanks," I reply.

I load my equipment into the back seat of Tristan's car and then I sit in the passenger seat. As Tristan drives toward the funeral, I recall one of my favorite memories of Kat. During our Senior Prom, Kat requested that the disc jockey play her favorite song "Total Eclipse Of The Heart". Once the song started playing, she dragged me out onto the floor and insisted that I dance with her. We had the most fun making up our own dance moves. Some people called us nerds because of that, but we didn't care. Kat played that song so many times for me at her house that it is forever etched into my brain. That is how I know that I will be able to sing the song no matter how addled my mind is.

"Connie... Connie..." Tristan utters as he tries to cut into my memory.

"Huh?" I ask as I snap out of it.

"We're here," Tristan announces somberly.

I get my equipment out and turn around to once again feel my heart does a jump inside me. I am in a park and the first thing I see is Kat's coffin which immediately causes my face to get wet. I wipe it with one of my handkerchiefs and I decide that now is as good as time as any to say my final goodbye to my best friend. I walk towards her coffin and I am intercepted a number of times by some of my friends offering hugs and warm wishes. Even Raphael is there since he is such a good friend of mine. When I finally get to my goal, I set my player on the ground and I put my hand on the casket as a tear falls to the ground.

"It wasn't supposed to be this way, was it? Kat, I want you to know that I will always love and remember you. I miss you so much it hurts. I also want you to know that I'm sorry. I shouldn't have let you go off to that meeting by yourself when I knew that something wasn't right. I should have shadowed you. I failed to protect you and I am sorry. I swear to you that I will find whoever did this and I will make the coward pay even if I have to use my last breath to do it."

I turn around and I wipe away three more tears and blow my my nose. It looks like it is time to retire this hankie already and start on a clean one. I just hope that I brought enough.

"That is a nasty case of survivor's guilt, Connie," my blond friend Leo admonishes me from behind while putting a hand on my right shoulder. "It isn't healthy and Kat wouldn't want you to feel that way."

"It isn't fair!" I cry out.

"It never is," Leo agrees while giving up trying to argue with me since he knows that it would cause a scene. "It looks like you have something special planned. Would you like to go first?

"Yes, please," I accept.

I don't hear any of Leo's introductory speech because I am engaged in a round of deep breathing to calm my nerves. As soon as Leo announces me, I put in the CD and turn on the microphone.

"I am here to pay homage to my best friend Kat Hong. I have known her practically my whole life since we grew up together in the States. I am extremely grateful for helping me through many science courses since it was never my best subject. We helped each other through so many other scrapes growing up. I wanted to come up with a special way to say goodbye and could come up with only one way of doing it. I am going to sing Kat's favorite song 'Total Eclipse Of The Heart'. I can only hope that you can hear me sing this to you, Kat."

I push play on the stereo and the song begins. I am using a karaoke CD so that I wouldn't have to sing over Bonnie Tyler's voice. The song starts out steady and requires more energy as the song goes on. I am pouring my entire self into this song and I am really feeling a strain on myself halfway through the song. No matter how hard this endeavor gets for me, I have promised myself that I will get through this for my pal. I can feel my eyes start to get moist when I sing the chorus since that is the part of the song that requires the most energy. After I finish, I feel like that I am about to explode so I sit in a nearby chair and start sobbing.

I am not aware of anything else that happens during the services because I am too tired and too upset to care. A few people make speeches and everything ends with Kat's burial at the cemetery which causes me to start bawling again. What I do know is that my friends who are there all want me to spend the rest of the day with them. Tristan and Leo both want me to go to a bar so we can all drink our pain away. My older acquaintance Alia wants me to go to her place so she can cook dinner for me. Maybe I just want to be by myself.

Who do I go with?

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