Not a prank,right?

Hearing the oh so familiar grunts from the TV, Robert couldn't be more shocked. Was someone playing a joke on him? If it wasn't for the professionalism from the tv anchors or the high-budget porn actresses, he wouldn't doubt what was happening. So what was going on here?

Looking down at his strained jeans and the feeling of the material brushing against his throbbing cock, Robert knew he was awake. So he wasn't dreaming.

Not one to waste a free fap, he fished his aching cock out, and conveniently, there was a bottle of lub on the table next to him. Perfect. It didn't take long to cum, being still tender from the night before. With a inhale and butt clench, Robert quickly spurted into the wet wipes he absently grabbed along the way.

While tidying up, Robert glanced back at the tv as commercials came on, one after another. Not one ad was spared from pornographic material. Not one. Whether it was a laundry product displaying it's prowess as a 'great' option to clean cum stains, as a man spurts cum onto a ladies shirt. Or a drink that had the added benefit of stripping all your clothes(though Robert wasn't sure how that was possible). It all pointed to the fact that this was all real, and somehow, aligned with all his fantasies. Just, how could he not be stunned?

"Could this be REAL!?" Stumbling back, either from cum-legs or shock, Robert absently switched the tv off, thinking. Sitting down at the kitchen table he checked the time. 7:30am. Least he had a bit of time, he knew that his day was just starting.

-Knock- -Knock-

Hearing the door, Robert checked who it was, "Hello?". A few seconds passed as he heard some rustling. "Sir, just a second. I-can't seem to get your package...". A barely audible voice came through from the other side of the door.

Longer than normal passed as Robert thought they would leave the package and go, he was not one to open the door to strangers, even if it was to deliver a parcel. He heard about people scamming, robbing or even home invading when people opened the door. Though it would serve him right, as he hadn't installed a peep-hole on his door; spending his leftover money on lube and porn instead.

Waiting for a few minutes, he tentively cracked the door. Eyes growing wide, there was a bubble butt, swaying to and fro, back and forth. His inner perv crushing his alertness, Robert opened the door till it was completely open. Eyes still staring, he knew this was a delivery person by the Ups logo that was getting sandwiched between her crack as the off brown thong stretched and contorted with her movements. She seemed clueless that he had opened the door.

Why did this UPS hottie remind him of those metre maids? If it wasn't for the hat, logo and those distinctive hiking boots, he would've guessed it was one of his college neighbours pulling a fast one on him.