Mostly heterosexual (white female v. black male)

The White Queen’s Rook entered first. An armoured colossus, housing armed warrior women, it moved to the black square designated a1. Next to them, towards b1, rode the proud White Queen’s Knight on her mighty charger. The Bishop was next, positioned between the Knight and her mistress, the White Queen.

Strong and imperious, the Queen felt herself to be more than a match for any black man. Her face was pale as alabaster, but she glowed with a proud beauty. The White Queen stood on a square of her own colour. Next to her, stood her weak husband: The pussy-whipped White King had grown up in a matriarchy and was little more than a figurehead. Even so, his defeat would lose his side the battle. His women had to protect him at all costs.

The White King’s advisor, the Bishop, stood to the right of her master. Beside her, the White King’s Knight rode into position as proudly as had the Queen’s Knight before her. Onto the final white square of the first rank rumbled the White King’s Rook and its armed contingent.

The first rank were all in place. In front of them trudged the cannon fodder. Eight poorly dressed and poorly armed female pawns. They looked nervously, but lustfully, across the battlefield as their counterparts, eight equally poorly dressed black men took up their positions in the distance on the seventh rank.

Behind the black pawns, the rest of the black men’s fighting entered.

The Black Queen stood facing the White Queen from the eighth rank, also on a square of her own colour. Tall and imperious was the only female member of the black army. Stronger than any of the men that surrounded her, she wore an intimidating strap-on dildo at her crotch. She would show those white bitches who ruled the battlefield.

Beside her, on square c8, stood her advisor, the wise Black Bishop, his greying hair contrasting with his ebony skin. Next, the Black Queen’s Knight, a brave warrior, with a snorting black stallion gripped between his thighs. On square a8, the Black Queens armoured Rook held more of her troops.

To the Black Queen’s left, stood the Black King. As weak as his white counterpart, the King needed protecting at all costs. If he was into a corner, the game was lost.

Advising him was the Black King’s Bishop, another wise cleric. The Black King also had a bold Knight. And finally, he too had a contingent of troops ready to do battle from their armoured Rook.

All of the pieces were in place. A hush descended over the battlefield. Then the white controller ordered the first move.