Keep it professional.

“Hello.” You answer in a friendly, yet professional tone. “I'm not with the performers.” At least you guess she is talking about performers. “I'm with Westmooring Security” and you show her your ID. “Could you point me to the security tent?”

“Too bad.” She smiles as she produces a fairground map, “not many guys are into cosplay, especially the well built cute ones.” After circling a tent at the fair northeast corner of the map she points down a path framed by fake medieval buildings. “Go down Watling Street take a right at the Well of Forbidden Wishes then your second left past the Pikachu's Palace of Plush Pals to the Queen's Court of Grub and Suds, don't go left or you will end up in Superland, nor straight into Furry-town, and believe me someone like you doesn't want to get lost in there, instead stay to your right and follow Ye Olde Wondering Way until you come to the Inn of the Welcoming Wench, go left past the Green Griffon taking the right fork, not the left turn towards the Jousting Field, instead continue straight until you go through the Tunnel of the Rat-King, take your first right then second left until you come to Pillory Place. On the left is the Witch-With-a-B Dunking Booth, the security tent is on the other side, near the pillory.”

“Sure.” You nod your head pretending that made any sense. Realizing there is little use in asking her to repeat such a convoluted set of directions you thank her and head down the fake cobblestone path studying the map, ignoring her blatant stare as she checks out your ass as you walk away.