Destination: Paradise

After attempting to locate the addresses on the list. Lois was getting frustrated. Some of them led to buildings that were clearly uninvolved (one of them was just a McDonald's,) some led to sites that were derelict and obviously abandoned, and some of them simply did not exist. As she sat in the back of a cab wondering if the shower-head would forgive her for ditching it and take her back, she examined the list one last time. She suddenly remembered some of the code breaking skills she had learned from Bruce and realized that one of them seemed very promising. The numbers of the address weren't literal address numbers. Instead, they indicated which letters of the street names made up the code. After sorting them all through she instructed the cab driver to take her to Destination: Paradise, a club that had recently opened and that from the beginning Lois had found suspicious. Finding its name in a code on a bottle taken from some very shady folks confirmed her hunch. She paid the driver and decided to case the place a little first before going in. She walked to the end of the block and circled around the alley to scope out the back door. There was a fence keeping her from getting too close, but she was close enough to see and hear. And what she saw and heard validated her concerns. She saw Lex Luthor, Talia al' Ghul, and Pamela Isley waiting by the door. She heard Luthor say, "He knew we were coming, right? So why is he making us wait?" Then she saw Ivy whisper something to Talia. They laughed, Luthor looked annoyed, and Talia said something about, "Isn't that just like all men?" Then they were finally let in. Lois had paid close attention but there was no sign of a password or secret knock or code, so she'd have to get in another way. She decided to try the front door approach. Unfortunately so did about 100 other people. She recognized some of them. They were the movers and shakers, the taste makers and trend setters, the cream of Metropolis. Star writer for the Daily Planet Lois Lane could just flash her press credentials and get right in, but Undercover Journalist Looking Into A Conspiracy Story Lois Lane couldn't. Fortunately she knew a thing or two about clubs. Looking at the people in the line she knew money wouldn't do it. So she approached the bouncer.

"Hey sweety, can you let me in around back? I'm a friend of your buddy. You know? That fella, Horatio."

It was a bit of bouncer speak she'd picked up somewhere along the way. She was amazed at how it was at the same time both incredibly smart and incredibly dumb. One look at the average bouncer and you wouldn't think they were very bright. But the code was fairly clever. Using the words "fella" and "Horatio" meant "I'll give you a blowjob." Get it? Drop the "a" from fella, and the "h", "o", and "r" from Horatio, and you get "fellatio". Also, if you combine the dropped letters you're left with ahor, or "a whore." See, not bad for some muscle headed security guards. The bouncer grinned wide.

"Oh, sure. Of course, anything for a friend of the house."

He shouted into the door.

"Hey, Bobby, watch the front for me for a minute, will ya? I gotta take Horatio's friend around back."

"Heheheh, yeah, sure Terry, no problem."

And simple as that, Lois followed the bouncer into the back alley.